Array
(
[text] =>

Hey everyone, here's the next chapter, even if its short. However, I hope you all enjoy it and will patiently wait for the next chapter. And, I'll say this in advance, I'm sorry if the next chapter takes me as long to post. I've been busy and haven't really had as much free time as I would hope to write. :(

Well, enough about that. 

Enjoy.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Aiden's P. O. V.

"No," I replied almost instantly, my eyes hard and leaving no room for arguments.

I unlocked the car as we came upon it and climbed in, a frown on my face. I then buckled myself in and started the car. My hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, causing my knuckles to turn white from the amount of force I was exerting, as I waited for Nathan to join me, my thoughts in a turmoil.

Why? Why did he have to bring this up, and at such a time?

Depression seemed to fill my heart at the inevitable. I knew this was going to happen sooner or later, I just had been hoping for later. But it seems like that wish will not come true, as I couldn't see me being able to avoid this confrontation even if I wanted to.

And even after I hold him back from meeting them this time, it was only a matter of time before he does end up meeting my parents, or should I say, my father.

And God did I dread the moment when that ends up happening.

"What?" Nathan asked, surprise flashing through his eyes, having not expected me to refuse so blatantly and without hesitation, and hurriedly climbed into the car from the passenger side as well. "Why not?"

Nathan's eye brows scrunched together as he gave me a confused look, not understanding the reason behind my refusal, but I hardly glanced his way, knowing that if I did, he would see the struggle within my eyes as I fought the guilt and pain at the knowledge that if he did end up meeting my father, then we would no longer be able to see each other again.

In fact, my father would do anything possibly to keep Nathan away from me, even if it meant transferring me to another school or even moving houses, because, how could my father stand to know that his son was taking an interest in a man.

It wouldn't surprise me if he started beating me up again, spouting the Bibles words my way and insulting me, saying how sinful it is to like another man, that I'll perish forever in hell, burning in its fiery pits. He may even say all this with a look that indicated that he had know all along I would turn out this way, like the signs were all but obvious to him, and he had only been waiting for the ball to drop and for me to mess up and reveal my secret.

It was painful to even imagine it all, for it was a future I knew I would not be able to stand, even for a moment, as a life without Nathan, was already impossible.

On the other hand, thinking about how my mother would react was even worse, as I couldn't stand the thought of disappointing her, or causing her shame in any way. I don't believed I'd be able to handle her walking away and turning her back on me, because it was a strong possibility that she may do just that.

And the moment she does, I don't think I'll be able to recover from such a blow, no mater how many years pass, I would always remember the moment she no longer thought of me as her son, and I was no longer able to call her 'mother.'

"I'm sorry, but that is the one thing I will never do," I said through clenched teeth, staring straight ahead through the window as I drove out of the parking lot and onto the street, my eyes strained and my resolve hardened by my thoughts.

"What, can't you at least tell me the reason why you refused?" Nathan complained, seeming dissatisfied with my response.

"Isn't it obvious?" I asked, my tone mocking, and I so badly wished that I could punch myself.

Why was I acting this way towards Nathan? I was only making matters worse, and ruining all the progress I have strived for these past couple of days, weeks even.

So why couldn't I stop myself from being harsh and crass?

But the answer was obvious, it was due to the fear I felt towards the idea of him meeting my parents.

However, no matter what, I needed to take a chill pill, before I really screw things up between Nathan and I, which didn't seem so far off at this point from the way things were progressing.

Nathan scowled angrily my way. "Apparently not," he snapped darkly.

Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to calm down. "Do you not remember how messed up I was in the past, there's a reason why I had become like that," I hinted, but only received a blank stare in return. I then grew frustrated and further explained my words. "You know how I hated gay people in general?"

"Yeah, not hard to forget that," Nathan snipped, but his eyes no longer held any lingering grudge towards the past, but instead were wary and thoughtful as he tried to figure out where I was going with all this.

"Well, I hadn't always been like that, that is, until I started getting influenced into thinking in such a way," I admitted with a sigh.

"So you're blaming your reason for becoming a bullying jerk on your parents?" Nathan questioned with a scowl, but it seemed that understanding was slowly creeping into his eyes, and I could detect a hint of sympathy in them as well, which I did not like one bit.

I didn't need anyone's pity, especially Nathan's.

Sure back then I had been weak and had caved under my father's constant 'teaching,' but I was no longer like that. I have broken away from my father's will, and have created a world of my own to believe in and beliefs to follow.

I was no longer so easily controlled, and never will I be again.

However, I didn't speak all this out loud, as surly I would only anger Nathan further and cause all the work I had done to get close to Nathan, to vanish into thin air.

"No, parent," I corrected softly. "It was the fault of just one of my parents, my father to be exact."

"What do you mean?" Nathan asked, but from what I could tell, it seemed that Nathan already had an idea of where this was all going.

"I'm sure you can guess already what I mean by that. Although that man is a walking contradictory," I said, causing Nathan to shoot my a confused look, but this was only natural, as only I knew what I meant when I said that, as I had been referring to his cheating ways even when he proclaims to worship god or whatever, "he has one thing he hates more than anything in the world, and that is anyone who strays from the form of normality. Meaning those who find the same sex appealing, even those who change their sex from what they once originally were."

"So he's one of those religious people," Nathan commented with a resigned sigh, now completely understanding where I was coming from when I had insisted on him not meeting my parents. "What of your mother?" Nathan suddenly asked.

I smiled bitterly. "Honestly, even I do not know how she will react when she finds out that my first love is a man," I admitted, and it wasn't until the words were out of my mouth, that I realized what I had just said.

Instantly I blushed bright red, feeling somewhat embarrassed at having admitted that without hesitation, as I did just confess that Nathan was the first ever person that has captured my heart, and, although this wasn't the first time that I have told Nathan about my feelings towards him, it was still something I was not used to admitting.

A hint of redness stained Nathan's cheek as well, and an awkward silence seemed to fill the air, which became even more stifling to be around.

It was at that moment that we arrived in front of Nathan's house. 

With a cough, Nathan unbuckled himself and gripped the door handle, but he paused before opening the door and turned his head to face me.

His cheeks still held a hint of red from my earlier words, and his eyes seemed to gleam with an unknown emotion as he gazed at me intensely, causing my heart to beat slightly faster in my chest.

"Thank you for tonight," he said, somewhat hesitantly, seeming shy in a way, and it only further made me fall in love with him and his adorableness.

A small tremble went through me, unnoticed by Nathan, as I mentally restrained my desires to reach over and hug the damned boy, but it seemed like it was only becoming harder to do so as the days go by. I could only hope that Nathan will become mine soon so that I can ease these burning urges.

I took a deep breath, then let it out softly and eased the tension from my muscles. "Its nothing. Didn't I say I was going to prove my feelings to you. Besides, wasn't this your idea in the first place?" I teased with a relaxed smile, my words in no way said to cause anger.

Nathan chuckled with amusement. "I suppose so," he replied and opened up the car door, then slid out and shut the door behind him. However, instead of leaving, he tapped on the passenger side window and indicated for my to lower it, as it seemed that he had something else to say.

I furrowed my brows in confusion, but lowered the window all the way and stared out to give Nathan a questioning look. "What's wrong?"

"Just for curiosity sake, so you already know then, that you've yet to prove your worth?" Nathan slyly wondered with a raised brow, resting his cheek on his upturned palm, whereas his elbow was perched on top of the car window sill as he stared through the opening towards me with bright, mischievous eyes.

"You know, I'm starting to think that this is less for the reason of me proving myself, and more for your own enjoyment," I commented with a shake of my head, the corners of my mouth twitching as I suppressed the small smile from forming on my face.

He only smirked in response before turning to leave. "I'll see you tomorrow," Nathan said with a backwards wave of his hand.

Really now, this little devil.

I shook my head yet again, amazed by this damned boy who always managed to surprise me with how unpredictable he and his actions are.

It seems I really have my work cut out for me, I thought with a chuckle.

Happiness then seemed to fill me for the fact that I had accomplished what I had set out to do today, and that was to impress Nathan and at least get him to start liking me once again. It even seems like I have done that and more!

My mind then wandered to my earlier words and I groaned out loud in frustration that was caused by my carelessness and loose mouth. However, a small smile spread along my face as I watched Nathan enter his house. The reason for this smile was due to the knowledge of the fact that Nathan no longer seemed to reject me, not even a little bit, despite his stubbornly strong denial towards such suspicions.

Why do I think this? It is only because when I had accidently said I loved him, I had seen a flash of pleasure in his eyes, and that could only mean one thing, and this is that Nathan has whole heartedly come to accept me and my feelings.

It was only a matter of time before I have his confession.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Insert smug face above*

Lol. =3=

Anyways, V/C/F.

Until next time, peace out. :)

[text_hash] => 6dd2202b
)