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Chloe,

I'm not scary. You're just too scared to offend me because you're paranoid of losing me.

Going to level one was my biggest mistake – that's obvious. But do you know what my next biggest mistake was? It was leaving you, even when you still wanted to hang on. Let me go, Chloe. Get on with your life. I'll still be here, on the other side of the ink, but I can't keep holding you back.

I love you, and I know you love me. But we need to love other people too.

Don't forget that I'm here, but don't rely on me. Because I think I've proven that I can't catch you when you fall. You need to do that yourself. I'm not the best friend you wish I was. That I wish I was.

Love,

Monica.

Thunder rumbled through my body, an untamed animal that had broken free from its reigns. Like a match meeting flame, a spark had erupted, so hot and wild that it overcame me entirely. I was a puppet to an animistic instinct manipulating my fingers to wind through his hair and filling me with a desperation, a need, to close the distance between us.

The small space between us had ignited.

William's hands were hard against my waist, the tips of his fingers digging into my skin in a bid to draw me close, even closer than the confines we were already subjected to. His lips were fast and dominant against mine, deepening our kiss in seconds, fueling the fire that I had started.

The whispers in my mind had long been dulled by an overtaking euphoria, capturing me with William's presence; his scent, his shoulders, his hot breath against my skin, his everything.

This wasn't for show; there was nobody here to see us. It was just us. Just him and I and an impulsive decision.

"God, why do you do this to me," he whispered as our lips fell momentarily apart, his voice husky and his breath tickling my ear.

God, why was I doing this to begin with? I asked myself, but then his mouth was back on mine and his hands were slipping lower, behind my thigh, pulling me even closer. I was sure I was going to explode. Sure that somehow, something in my chemical makeup had shifted and turned me into a completely different being.

I'm making out with William Bishop. In my wardrobe.

This was not planned, or condoned, or even thought through. No, this was a physical reaction to close proximity and our giddy high after the rollercoaster that was the last twenty-four hours. And the attraction which I couldn't deny I felt for him. He carried a charisma which gave him an unfair advantage.

"Will," I whispered, just as his lips started tracing down my jaw and across my neck, in a way which rose goosebumps to the most sensitive pieces of my skin. The fact that he was just as passionate as I felt in that moment made me feel electrified, and brought a whole new surge of feelings to my chest. "William."

He stopped, his breathing coming in sharp breaths, mirroring mine. My chest rose and fell against his at a quickened pace. "Just Will."

"What are we doing?" I squeaked, having to consciously stop the way my hands began to wander from around his neck to down his chest. "We can't do this."

"Why not?" he challenged, somehow moving even closer. "I don't think I've seen you lose control before, Chlo. I know how much you love control."

He was right. And that was why I needed to regain it. I deflected his kiss again, even if it made my heart lurch in yearning. "We need to get out of here."

"Didn't realize how fast you wanted to take this," he joked, his lips brushing against my ear.

"I mean out of the house," I whispered, not wanting to think any further about what this was. It was too complicated, and guilt was already starting to wind its way through my chest. My mind was screaming that this was wrong, but I couldn't believe it when my body felt so alive. "We're still hiding in my closet."

"I don't know, I kind of like it," he said, the flirty edge still thick in his tone. In the faint light creeping through the edge of the wooden doors, I could make out the twinkle of his eyes and the crook of his smirk.

I heard the clambering of my mom putting things away in the kitchen, and then the blaring of a radio as she switched on the speakers in the downstairs hallway, reminding me of the severity of our situation.

"But you should probably get to school," William went on, his words lingering in the warmth between us, his fingers tracing my collarbone, making me shiver as they slipped underneath the cotton strap of my shirt.

Shit, I thought, his words only reminding me how screwed I was going to be when I faced my teacher about the test. I still didn't know how I let this happen to begin with. How I'd instigated this.

I swallowed. "My mom is going to find out either way. I'll just pretend to be sick. But she needs to know I'm home, I mean she probably assumed I just left early this morning, if I go down now looking ill..."

William's fingertips ran down my arms, leaving a wake of electrifying currents bursting beneath my skin, distracting me.

"You can sneak out," I said a little forcefully as I tried to get a grip. I was starting to feel faint from all the action of the morning, and I couldn't deny I was starving and tired. As much as my body yearned to grab him again, it was only a matter of time before my mom came up here, and the anxiety was driving me crazy.

"Trying to get rid of me," he pondered cockily. Then he sighed, giving a rueful smile and backing away. "No – I understand. It may be better if we just have some air anyway. Today's been intense."

"Intense is an understatement," I muttered, tucking my hair behind my ears. It felt silly, conversing easily now when minutes ago it had felt as if we were seconds away from ripping each other's clothes off.

"Well neither of us got arrested," he said cheerfully, but something in his tone sounded distant. "Call me soon, okay? If you can get into the drive. Or if you... if you don't want to be the one to check what's on there."

I nodded briskly. I wanted to ask what this meant for us. I wasn't used to this, I didn't know what was right and what was not. Did this mean that I liked him? Did he think I liked him in that way? Did he like me in that way? Did I want him to?

None of it mattered. I wiped it from my head in one clean motion. We were two humans, teenagers at that, and we were attracted to each other. I was tired and not thinking clearly and it seemed like the right thing to do. I couldn't linger on it any further, not when I could be so close to executing my list.

"Chloe," William said, his hand cupping my cheek. "I... you know I really care about you."

I nodded again. He'd made no effort to hide that.

"It was out of guilt at first. For everything that happened to Mon. But it's more than that now," he confessed, before shaking his head slowly and dropping his hand, only to run it through his mussed hair instead.

I averted my eyes and shifted so I was closest to the opening of the wardrobe, not wanting to linger too long on his words. It was out of guilt at first. "We can't talk about this now. I'm going to go out there. Come down the stairs when you hear us talking. I'll direct her away from the foyer and you duck out the front door. Quietly, okay?"

"We did just rob a house," he reminded me. "I know what I'm doing."

I caught one more sliver of a smile before opening the door, the light in my room a contrast to the darkness of my closet. Moving from the cramped space helped restore some degree of clarity to my mind, but I couldn't shake the fact that it was still wild about William.

I slipped off my shoes first, before realizing I couldn't exactly go downstairs in jeans and a jacket. I looked back to where William was leaning against the door frame of the wardrobe and flicked my head. "Back in. I need to change."

He gave me a wide grin before retreating. I shook my head, feeling silly. I was just glad that there was no way he could see through to where I was pulling off my jeans and replacing them with pajama shorts.

I managed to distract Mom sufficiently while she yelled at me about cramps being no excuse not to tell her I was staying home. Luckily, though, it didn't last long. It was only a few minutes before she was brewing me a hot chocolate and insisting on calling the school while I laid down in bed.

God, I'd never been so relieved to have her as my mother.

When I returned to my room, Will now long gone, I couldn't help the weird feeling weighing me down. It was all done, and now I was alone. And so tired.

I opened my laptop up again to make sure the program would run while I caught up on the sleep I desperately needed. When I was sure it would continue, I nestled under the covers, my mind retreating back to the wardrobe.

And then I was drowning in the images and sensations of Will against me. And god, it wouldn't stop. My body was ecstatic, the experience playing on repeat, even more so than it had when Will had first kissed me to make Lola jealous.

Remembering that even then – mere weeks ago – he'd still been hung up on her, had my mind reeling in a mixture of paranoia and jealousy. Two things that I shouldn't be feeling. I should be mad, I should be planning how I could use our encounter to my advantage. But I wasn't.

My chest was hurting. Was I mourning the loss of what could have been? In another world, Will could have been my crush. I could have been his. But it was much more complex than that. I couldn't ignore the fact that he'd once loved the girl I loathed the most. He'd once sworn to secrecy to prevent justice for my best friend.

I definitely couldn't let myself grow feelings for him now. This had to stop. It wasn't realistic. He was part of a world I could never grow content with existing.

***

When sleep finally found me, it didn't let me go. I woke early the following morning, the sky still dark when I began to stir. As soon as I gained consciousness I reached to check my laptop, the program still searching for the right password match.

I sighed and fell back in bed, disorientated as I realized how long I'd actually slept. I hadn't contacted Will like he'd asked, so I sent him a quick text explaining that I hadn't found anything yet. I could still taste him against my lips, erupting an erratic beat to my heart.

I had to go to school.

I didn't know what had happened at Arlington yesterday. I had no idea what the aftermath of Maddy's dethroning had been. Had she shown her face? Had she made a doctor's appointment like she'd assured me?

It was barely six in the morning, but I found myself dialing her number anyway, despite the fact I was still groggy. To no surprise considering the time, the phone rang out with no answer.

When the time came to get ready for school I couldn't move. There was nobody there who I could face, save for maybe Maddy.

But, even so, I still got up and searched for an outfit. I showered away the sleep and applied makeup, checking the laptop every five minutes. How much longer would it take? I couldn't just take it with me to school. But I couldn't miss another day of class either.

Regretfully, I made sure it was set up to run smoothly before leaving the house for Arlington.

When I left my car, I half expected the school to be a defeated warzone. But, it was still abuzz, students chattering dramatically as I navigated my way to my locker, keeping my head down. It didn't matter, everyone's attention was still fixated on the topic of Maddy's picture anyway.

For the first time all year, I was desperate to evade level one. I shoved my things into the locker and dashed off to class, taking the most deserted route I could. I needed to get there early anyway, to beg the teacher to let me retake the test.

Although my morning was able to go without any run-ins with level one, I still had to see Jack. I had to endure the way he smiled gleefully whenever our gazes overlapped, his eyes pulling tight as he taunted me. Did he know what I did yesterday? I had to prepare myself for the worst. I just needed one more day.

At lunch time I skipped the cafeteria all together, instead going outside into the courtyard where the sky was drizzling with rain. The weather at least meant that I'd be alone. I crossed my legs on a seat under the veranda and peeled the lid off of my yogurt.

I didn't feel lonely or vulnerable like I had expected. For once, I felt on track, if a little impatient. The password could have been cracked right now, everything I needed could be sitting on my bed, waiting for me to view it.

Just as I was considering skipping my afternoon classes to check, a movement by the tree across from me caught my attention. I squinted to work out exactly what I was seeing.

At first, I saw Max, his huge frame easy to recognize. Then I noticed his head bobbing from side to side strangely, and then his hands tangled in someone's hair. He was making out with someone. For one split second, I thought it was Zach. But that was stupid. Why would they make out in broad daylight?

But then, when they turned so that Max's back was against the bark of the tree, I realized it was Claire who was busily undoing the buttons on his varsity jacket so she could run her hands over his chest. Claire.

I felt sick.

It took me a moment to deliberate what to do. I longed to go up and confront them. I felt protective of Claire, she still had her innocence, yet she was so willing to corrupt it. And then I remembered how pissed off Zach had been when I'd overheard him and Max. Max was making out with girls to supposedly hide their relationship.

But, this wasn't exactly a public show. He was just an asshole. Maybe he was doing it for his own enjoyment. Maybe Claire managed to seduce him. Maybe he was just like everything I already knew level one was like, and he just didn't give a shit.

I took out my phone, trying to look as if I were texting as I captured a few faraway photos, just in case I ever needed them. Then I picked up my belongings and walked away as fast as possible.

I promised myself that after all of this I'd tell Claire everything. The poor girl had gone from one guy stuck in the closet to another.

Maddy still didn't answer my calls when I tried again later that day. As I'd suspected, she wasn't in school. I tossed up going to her house on the way home from class, but came to the conclusion that the hard drive was more important.

As I pulled my bag over my shoulder after the chime of the final bell, I met eyes with Sophie in the hallway. She looked pleasantly surprised, her gaze so icy it made me shiver. I was bracing myself for her approach, but she simply gave me a wicked grin and turned away.

The lack of confrontation made me even more terrified for whatever she was planning.

As soon as I got home after fighting my way through the after-school traffic, I ran up the staircase to my room, typing in the pin to my computer as soon as my hands were in reach. When I saw that the password to the device had been breached my heart soared in a dangerous hope.

It could be everything I needed, or nothing useful at all. I couldn't risk relying on it. Nerves wrapped around me as I entered the removable storage, hundreds of folders appearing on the screen.

Like the hard drives themselves, the folders were organized by dates. I scrolled through them slowly, there were at least a hundred. But there was only one date I cared about right now. I just wanted to know the truth about what happened to my best friend.

But the date was missing.

I let out a curse. Of course he would hide it. The thought of him deleting it brought fear to my stomach, until I stumbled across an unusual folder name at the bottom. Unlike the others, it wasn't labeled with an organized date.

Adieu mon Rouge. In one quick sweep, I highlighted the title and entered it into Google Translate. Farewell my Red.

My heart froze, cloaking in a sheet of ice so cold it felt as if it were made of razor blades in the way it stung. Though I was numb with anticipation, my fingers somehow managed to double click.

The folder revealed thirty or so media files, the thumbnails making it look as if they'd all been taken in the same place. The same night. Darkness, green and purple films of light. The odd white background.

With bated breath I highlighted them, my stomach squirming with a knot so tight I thought I was going to be sick.

I pressed play.

AN: thank you to everyone continuing to submit covers. you can now view all the submissions on my pinterest, check my message board for a link! you can still keep sending them through for another week.

thanks so much for reading. this next chapters going to be different, but as you may suspect it will also reveal a lot. i'm so nervous to share it.

love you guys and your hilarious, sweet and encouraging comments. Ann 💕

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