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Authors note: Hey people! This is a pretty long chapter compared to the others and it contains description of self harm and suicide. If these themes may trigger you I'd suggest you don't read this chapter! Instead get someone else too and give you the main plot of what happened or even message me and I'll explain briefly. As always, thank you so much for the reads! Feel free to comment, vote or share they always make my day!

"And your lane is #5, just right there next to mine", I pointed to the blue counter with a cash register on top in front of me, which was bordering our customer service department.

I had been training Charlie for the past two hours, it was painful but he catches on pretty quickly and wasn't being overly rude. Sure there was an insult here and there, but nothing major. I managed to teach him our cashing systems and what produce went where, now all that's left was stocking inventory. I led him through the twisting isles of supplies and to the back of the store, opening the double doors into our storage room.

"Make sure you put the door stopper underneath the door, it's to your right, these doors lock from the inside", I said. God imagine if we let the doors closed, were some of the only people working today. We'd be locked in here for ages!

"Holy shit that's a ton of food!", Charlie's eyes widened as he looked around at the 10ft tall ceilings, shelves filled to the brim with everything from canned soup to frozen spring rolls, cartons of unpackaged goods scattered around the cold tile floor.

"Well what do you expect? We are a grocery store." I rolled my eyes at his shock and turned on the florescent lights. Sometimes I don't get how someone so unbelievable hot can be so dumb. Wait! No not hot I meant-ummm...

A loud thud awoke me from my thoughts. Oh f*ck, the doors!

"Charlie I told you to put down the door stopper! We're locked in here now!", I yelled. Wow I really wasn't having any luck today, was I?

"I thought I did, it must have slipped out! Don't you like, have a key or something?"

"No you dumbass, I'm not the manager!", my god this boy was truly an idiot.

Charlie and I ran to the door, pounding on it screaming for help. I took out my phone and tried to call Terry.

Shit, no service

After another 15 minutes of yelling and banging on the door, we let our hoarse voices rest and took a seat on one of the crates. Charlie sat down in front of me, flashing a quick look of delight before letting his face fall into its norm. Why the hell would he be delighted to be trapped in this room? Did I mention it was f*cking freezing!?

"Sooooooo... what now?", I looked up from the floor and saw Charlie resting his elbows on his black dress pants, head propped up in his hands.

"I dunno, guess we just wait? Terry usually comes to do an inventory count around 7:30," I glanced down at my navy leather strapped watch, " and it's currently 6:58."

"Awesome, I'm stuck in a storage closet with the schools biggest dweeb!"

"Hey! I'm not a dweeb, I'm just a nobody and sorry but just because I'm lower on the social latter than you, doesn't mean you can go insulting me!", whoa, where did that confidence come from? Charlie looked up at me as shocked as I was.

With my sudden surge of confidence a thought entered my mind and I knew I couldn't keep pushing it down. It needed to be said. F*ck my life.

"Listen, I know you didn't want to talk about it but Charlie my minds been screwed up ever since that party and I need to know; why did it happen?"

"Jeez Ace I said it was nothing! We we're both drunk and you just banged into me, don't read into any of it kid."

"I'm not a kid I'm the same age as you, and sorry but if it was nothing then why did you come kneel down to comfort me when I jumped off the bed?"

"Shut up! I was really drunk okay?! I only sat down next to you because the thick ass fog in my mind probably blinded me from seeing you were a dude! There's nothing more too it so shut up you idiot f*g!"

I stood up and pointed a finger at him in anger, "I'm not freaking gay! And if you were sooo drunk like you said you were, then why can you remember all of this so clearly, hmm? I think you knew what you were doing, Charlie. I also think that you liked it, I could feel your f*cking hardass boner!", oh my god where was this coming from!? not a single of those ideas were in my brain before I begun speaking, I swear.

"I SAID SHUT UP, LOUGHTY!", My eyes widened in fear as I sidestepped away from Charlie's fist hurling towards my face. Instead of hitting me, it went straight into the metal shelf. He muttered something to himself before examining his knuckles, and that's when I caught sight of the cuts on his wrist as his white sleeves slid up. Suddenly, guilt entangled my body, making its home in the pit of my stomach, weighing me down like a pile of rocks. Charlie was hurting, badly. Charlie Simmons was in so much pain, just like Eleanor once was. Just like I once was. I knew I couldn't leave it alone, I mean he was a douche but it'd be wrong to not try and help, right?

You have to Ace, you can't let him get as far as Eleanor. You have to help this time. You need to help this time

"C-Charlie what happened to your wrist?", I stuttered, reaching out to hold his arm. He let me do so and looked down to the ground for two seconds before his vulnerability disappeared and he stumbled back, pushing his sleeves down his strong arms.

"I-it's nothing,", he said while sitting back on the crate, " just scratches from helping my dad at work, he fixes roofs."

He's lying Ace, keep pushing, be strong

I took a deep breath, this was going to be a long and hard conversation. Totally not how I expected my Monday to go.

"Charlie I of all people know those aren't scratches. They're cuts that you created purposely. I don't know why you would, I mean you have the entire student body bowing down to your every move and a stable family life from what I've heard, but we're not leaving this closet until I know what's going on.", holy heck those words came out of my mouth?! Where was all of this assertive attitude when Willow fought with me? Or when my mom shut me out?

"Leave it alone, Ace. You don't know what you're talking about. I told you idiot, they're just scratches. Why do you care anyways?", Charlie scoffed, rolling his eyes. I sighed, if only he knew.

"Because contrary to popular belief, I'm not a complete and total ignorant dipstick! I've been through hell and back Charlie, I of all people know what pain you're feeling so please let me help. I wouldn't ever be able to forgive myself if I let this brush past me... give me a chance, please?"

"No! You're probably just a perv trying to get into my pants and are using my personal issues to find my 'soft spot'! I can't ev-"

"Yeah yeah, don't flatter yourself, I would never in a million years go for some

peabrain asshat like you.", I cut him off. Is it just me or are my insults improving by the second?

"What's that supposed to mean!?", Charlie raised a hand to his chest, wearing an expression of what I assume to be... confusion? Man this boy is hard to read.

"It means that I want nothing to do with your little 'Oh I'm such a tough bad boy!' act you have going on.", I teased, "You maybe able to have convinced the entire school but not me. I'll admit I'm not academically smart, but I have common sense and can easily pick up on lies. So cut the bullshit, Charlie. I can see straight through your little bubble of popularity and friends, you're just a cold hearted, dumb, stuck up teenager like everyone else in this cruel world!"

"Have you ever experienced real pain? Huh? Have you ever had the light of your world and only sibling kill herself?!", Charlie's eyes widened and he tried to apologize but I knew what I was doing was going to work, "Have you ever once in your life had to worry about something more than how your hair looks? Or what you'll be doing after school? 'Cause I have Charlie! I've experienced all that and more, I have had kid after kid after kid use me for attention, for pity. They didn't even f*cking know her! They just walked all over me acting all chummy and left when it was convenient for them. You have never gone through anything of such! All of your little minions worship the ground you stand upon and you can't get enough of it! So grow the hell up, Charlie. Stop pretending you're the best thing that's happened to this world, I can guarantee you you're not even close.", I watched as Charlie glanced up at me with sadness filling his eyes, quickly turning to rage. I had to admit my words were pretty harsh, but hey! I knew he was going to fill me in on his life now, I didn't mean all of what I said. It was just a ploy to have him open up to me. Oh wow I sound like a manipulating jerk!

"Shut the f*ck up, Ace! You know nothing about me! Not a single thing, okay? You don't get how exhausting and painful my so called perfect life is! I may get a shit ton of attention and I may have a supportive family but that doesn't tell you what I've gone through!", Charlie was standing now, his once calm face overflowing with emotions as he shoved me into a wall of shelves and lifted his sleeve to show me his wrist."These little cuts you were so intrigued by? You're right, they're not scratches I slit my wrists purposely because I'm depressed and alone, so don't go glorifying me!"

"My life is exhausting. I have no real friends, they all use me for popularity and gossip behind my back. My parents are so busy with their restaurant that I barely see them! My little sister is going through that moody tween face where she hates my guts and even my own dog doesn't look me in the eye! I don't even feel things, Ace. My soul is an endless pit of numbness, I cut to feel something. Anything. I know it's an awful thing to do but I like seeing the blood run down my wrists, it shows me i'm still alive and that i'm not some robot following the same routine everyday. Wake up, go to school, track practice, go home, make dinner, study, shower, sleep, repeat. My life is a never ending boring cycle and I'm sick of it! Do you know I'm actually really smart? I get 90s in every subject, the rumours of me failing are false, just like the one where I supposedly knocked up Ava kyler, or the one that said I buy a pound of weed per week. I'm actually a good kid. Sometimes... I-I wish I was dead!"

Charlie backed away from me, his hands covering his face but not before I saw a tear slip down his pale face. He ran his fingers through his silky black locks and laughed.

"I don't even know why I told you all that, it's not like you give a shit about my life."

"I do give a shit, Charlie. I didn't mean any of those crude things I yelled, I just needed to anger you enough so you'd confide in me. I want to help you, I truly do. Eleanor- that was my sisters name. She killed herself because of me, because I wasn't there for her when she needed me the most, I can't let the same happen with you. I'm not saying we have to be best friends... I just want you to know that I'm hear if you ever wanna, y'know... talk I guess.", Charlie looked up at me, not bothering to hold back the tears anymore. "And I apologize for bringing up the party, we don't have to talk about it again, I promise. Let's just forget it so we don't ruin either of our lives, okay?"

"Oh trust me you ass, I'd love nothing more but I f*cking can't! All because of you!" Charlie's eyes were overcome with sudden fury, his mood shifting completely as he attempted to hide his vulnerability.

I won't lie his words stung a bit, apparently everything that goes wrong in people's lives is because of me. For once I want to be the person that helps, not destroy.

"Why? Why can't you even just pretend to forget? Please Charlie I don't want any trouble,

I'm happy to help you out with your mental health but I'm not gay either so let's just pretend it didn't happen.", Charlie stopped and looked at me with a look on his face that showed, pity? Fear? Longing?

Before I knew it Charlie stepped forward, his eyes narrowing. I closed my eyes and braced myself, anticipating the brutal beating that was surely on it's way. I knew I shouldn't have pried at him so much, him opening up to me was probably just a trick so he could use me as his own personal punching bag.

"I f*cking hate you.", Charlie sneered. To my surprise I didn't feel a fist to the face but rather something press onto my lips.

OHMYGOD CHARLIE SIMMONS IS KISSING ME AGAIN!

My mind raced and my body became limp as I moved alone with Charlie's motions.

I was kissing him back.

I was kissing him back?

I was KISSING HIM back!

Before I could shove his chest away from me I felt his tongue slip into my mouth, intensifying our kiss. I let out a small whimper, and that's when everything else in the world faded away. Not Willow or my mom or even Eleanor was on my mind. The only though and feeling I had was Charlie. I felt his hand graze my stomach as he pulled up my shirt, his lips pressing harder and harder against mine, his breath getting faster, growing with hunger.

Suddenly, I didn't care if he was a guy, all I wanted was to be with Charlie. Not just in this moment but for a long while after it. I wanted him. I wanted to go on millions of cheesy dates with him, to kiss him like this whenever I felt free too. I wanted to cuddle with him while watching movies, to hold his hand while walking down the school hallway. I wanted to wipe away all his issues from the world and give him the life he deserved.

I don't care anymore!

I need him.

You hear that world? I guess I like a f*cking guy!

My thoughts sounded foreign in my own brain, but there was a feeling of excitement and thrill behind them. I've mentioned before that I've kissed girls before, but none of those embraces felt like this. They were always awkward and messy. This felt right. Charlie felt right.

I stood motionless as Charlie's muscular arms wrapped around my waist, he pulled back and leaned his forehead against mine.

"Wipe that look off your face, it drives me crazy." Charlie's expression was taken over by a smirk, mine swarmed with confusion.

What look? What was he talking about? He didn't punch me? Could it be possible that he likes me too?

Oh shut up, Ace! He's Charlie f*cking Simmons, he doesn't settle for anyone, his issues are all lies. Don't fall into his trap! He's trying to turn you into a f*g to be made fun of! You don't actually like him, you're just lonely.

I tried to move away from his embrace but he caught me off guard and smashed his soft lips into mine once again. I gave in as my body fell into his, letting his warm self envelope me.

We stayed like this for a long time, we would've continued on longer if it wasn't for the sound of Terry's keys fumbling at the doors. We reluctantly tore apart as Terry entered the storage room.

"What the hell are you two doing here?!"

Charlie and I both looked at each other and giggled.

Oh nothing, just having the worlds most confusing make-out session

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