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Breathe, Jason, breathe. It's just Isabella. The girl you've known your entire life. Asking her to hang out with you isn't a big deal. Just walk up to her and say, "Hey, wanna hang out today?" She'll either say yes or no. But what if she actually says no? Or worse, what if she—

"Sir."

I looked up and my gaze went towards the guard standing inside the booth. "Ah, yeah?"

"You can head in now."

"Right. Thanks."

He gave me a curt nod and I drove slowly into her backyard.

Looking at the familiar house, it was strange coming back here after so long. Despite how long I'd been away, everything still looked the same. The design was minimalist—a series of rectangles constructed of glass and bricks—and yet it was unmistakingly breathtaking.

Parking the car, I took a deep breath and made my way up the curved pathway to her front door. I stood on her doorstep with my hand in mid-knock. Whatever courage I had before was gone. Just being here made my breathing rapid. My stomach shifted uneasily as my mind raced back to the night that started it all. Even with the cold air of a December afternoon, sweat began to glisten on my forehead. With my left hand clasped tightly on the door handle, my other hand shook in a way I couldn't control as I finally found the nerves to knock on the door.

When the door opened, I came face to face with Mrs. Ace. It took a second or two for Mrs. Ace to get over the initial shock of seeing me, but when she did, she gave me a warm smile.

"Jason?" She continued to stare at me. "It's nice to see you again. What can I do for you?"

"Um, I was wondering if I could speak with Isabella?" I asked, trying to keep my voice as steady as possible. Even though I was panicking on the inside, I didn't need her to know that.

"May I ask why?"

I sighed, fully expecting that response. "I was hoping she wasn't too busy to hang out with me today. I just want to talk to her."

There was a slight pause and for a second I thought she was going to say no when she nodded her head a moment later.

"All right." She smiled. "Just make sure to bring her back before it gets too dark."

"Of course, Mrs. Ace." As much as I wanted to spend as much time with Isabella as possible, I couldn't blame her for being overprotective. If it wasn't for me, Mrs. Ace wouldn't have to worry about Isabella every time she left the house.

"Jason?" I heard the worry in her tone and I looked up to see her eyes showing the kind of gentle concern she did the night it happened. "You do know it's not your fault, right?"

"I know." I laughed at how pathetic that sounded even to my own ears. Of course it's my fault. Everything's my fault.

"Jason." She reached her hand out to me and laid it lightly on my shoulder. Instead of flinching back like I thought I would, I was soothed by it. "What happened that night wasn't your fault, so, please don't think I blame you. It was just bad luck."

I was only able to nod, unable to say anything. I knew all along that Mrs. Ace didn't blame me, but that didn't stop me from blaming myself. It wasn't bad luck. It could've been avoided if it wasn't for me.

"You wait here," she said, pulling me from my thoughts. "I'll go get Isabella for you. She's probably with John now." She gave me one last encouraging smile and left.

In a few seconds, I heard her voice telling Isabella someone was at the door for her.

I waited patiently as I tried to mentally prepare myself.

It's just Isabella, it's just Isabella, it's just Isabella. You've hung out with her lots of times before. It's nothing new. Just act like you normally do around her and be cool.

Ugh, what if I mess up though? We haven't hung out alone in so long—well, unless you count that time in the library. But that was only a fifteen minute conversation, so that doesn't count, right?

Shit, maybe I should just leave—

"Jason?"

Too late.

When I saw her, my senses came alive, and I was struck by her beauty. When my eyes met hers, I was happy to see that she wasn't wearing those stupid contacts that hid the intensity of her eyes. They shone back almost silver-like behind her glasses and when those tinted red lips of hers smiled, my heart skipped uncontrollably in my chest.

"Um, hey."

"Hey Jason." She blinked, her mouth pursed and slightly open. "What exactly are you doing here?"

Deep breaths, Jason. It's now or never.

"I was wondering if you wanted to hang out today?"

The anticipation that erupted through my body felt like tiny electrical sparks that shocked every visible layer of my skin. As I waited and waited for an answer, I desperately tried to hide how nervous I was in front of her. But, one could only willed their body to obey to such a degree. So, when I finally saw the nod of her head, the perspiration that started to occur died down a notch.

"Sure, just let me tell my parents."

My grin got wider as I nodded. Those simple words just made my month and everything better. Finding out that the girl you're practically in love with was dating your best friend pretty much spiraled me into a fit of rage and depression. I knew I should be happy for him, but I wasn't. I wanted nothing more than their relationship to end up in flames.

"My mom said yes. Come on, let's go!"

Before I could say anything, she took my hand in hers. I looked down at our hands entwined together as she made a beeline towards my car. It was only for a brief moment, but it really made me miss the times we had together as children.

"So, Jason, what made you decide you wanted to hang out with me today?"

"I wanted to get to know my best friend's girlfriend more." I shrugged, as I lied smoothly on the surface. While on the inside, I almost wanted to vomit for saying that.

"Oh." She nodded, accepting my answer. "Where exactly are we going?"

"To the park."

"The park?" she repeated. "Why?"

"You don't like the park?"

"Of course not," she said quickly, almost stuttering with her words. "I love it. It's just that I—"

"—never thought I'd bring you there?"

I saw the shock register on her face before she could hide it. A small smile played on her lips as she agreed with me. "Yeah, exactly."

"Well, there's a first time for everything." I chuckled, holding out the door for her. She climbed into the passenger's side quickly and whispered a small thanks in return. When I was situated in my own seat, I fastened my seatbelt and turned to Isabella. "You know, there's plenty of fun stuff we can do at the park."

"Like?"

"Nature hikes, swinging on the swings, going down the slides, building sandcastles . . ."

"You do know building sandcastles are for little kids, right?"

"What? No way!" Like I didn't know that. All I wanted to do was jog her memory somehow. I know it'd been years since the incident and nothing has ever triggered her memory, but I wasn't going to give up now. Especially after she showed signs of remembering our past together. It was a long shot, but she did recognize the bracelet. Although she didn't know the situation behind it, it was a start.

She laughed, completely unaware of my intentions. "Yes way!" she playfully copied my tone. "But hey, let's do it! It'll be fun."

"That's the spirit!" I said, as I switched the ignition from park to drive.

In less than five minutes, we'd arrived at the local park. Seeing that it was almost January, there was no one at the park but a mother of two, who appeared to be pushing her children on the swings.

As we entered the park, the pathway that we crossed was nothing more than dirt littered with piles of leaves on the ground.

"Where to first?" Isabella asked.

I smirked. "Do you even need to ask? The sandbox, of course!"

"Wanna race?"

"You're on."

As we ran past the large tree up on the hill, the swing set, and the monkey bars, we finally made it to the sandbox on the east corner. Isabella jumped in and sat on the wood that enclosed the sand and patted the spot next to her.

"Come on, aren't we going to build a sandcastle or something?" she asked, a twinkle in her eye.

I laughed, but obeyed and sat next to her. Throwing her the first shovel I saw, I dug around and found another one buried a little bit deeper.

"Wow, this sand actually feels like play-doh," she said, while she inspected the sand with her fingertips.

I smiled as I watched her. If only she could remember all the times she'd touch this sand, maybe then her memories of us would come back.

"Why do you think I like playing in this sandbox?" I laughed, bringing her attention back to me. "It's because it's easy to build a sandcastle. There's no extra steps needed to get the sand to stay."

"Do you go here often then?" she asked, as she absentmindedly played with the sand.

"Not all the time, but when I was younger, yeah." I watched her face for any signs of recognition. I tried not to show my disappointment when she just continued to stare at me.

"Really?"

I nodded. "With a friend of mine."

"It was with that little girl, right?" she asked. No, with you.

"Yeah," I said nonchalantly. "I'm surprised you remembered."

"I have a good memory." Besides the first few years of your life.

I smirked. "Why don't we test that out, shall we?"

"Test what out?"

"Let's see who really has the best memory and build a fairy tale themed castle."

When we were younger, we used to challenge each other a lot. Every time we went to the park, we would always try to out build one another, and every time we did, she won.

"You're so going to regret this."

"We'll see about that." I grinned. "On your mark, get set, go!"

As soon as the words left my mouth, we started digging like crazy maniacs. I knew from the very start, I was going to build the castle I assembled whenever I was with Isabella. Maybe if she saw it, something might come back to her. And even if she doesn't remember anything, I could at least say I'd spent the entire day with her. With that thought in mind, I focused my attention on the task at hand and went back to our challenge.

"Done!" she shouted half an hour later.

"Seriously?" I was about to stand up when I saw it. The blood drained from my face and my body movements became static. "Isabella. Why-why did you write that?" Does she remember? She has to, right? Why else would she write the word princess underneath the castle? Ever since we were young, it was her special way to let the prince know where the princess was. She said she wanted to help all the princes find their princesses easier.

"No reason." She shrugged. "I thought it would go along with the theme, don't you think?"

I sighed. In a blink of an eye, my hope was annihilated with one single answer. The desolation I felt was all too familiar, but I should've known better. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up too soon.

"It does." I forced a smile on my face. "You won though."

Her castle was different from all of the ones we'd built together in the past but it was still equally as impressive, perhaps even more so. Compared to hers, my castle was pretty sad looking. She was definitely a true artist who saw the world for how it was supposed to be seen—with purity and with an open mind.

"Yours is pretty awesome too, Jason!" she complimented. "I think we both won."

Looking at her, it was these little moments that made me realize why I fell for her in the first place. It was her gentleness and kindness that melted my heart. There was something in those blue eyes of hers that was so beautiful, so inviting, and warm, that I wanted nothing to shatter the light she projected every time she looked at me. I wanted to wrap her in my arms and protect her from the very people who wanted to destroy the smile on her face.

I wanted to go back in time before everything happened, to when I was her Jay and she was my little princess. Because letting her go was the hardest thing I could have ever done. 

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