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THE GRAMMAR IN THIS CHAPTER IS WORSE THAN USUAL

"You look like a zombie."

I feel like one too.

"What? All I'm going to get is a grunt?" Rebecca asks,"No explanation of how you disappeared off the face of the earth?"

"Not now." I groan rubbing my head. It had been a long day and to be honest one that I couldn't wait to put an end to by just going to sleep but I knew that tomorrow was going to be much much worse.

If that's even possible.

"If it makes you feel worse Samantha ditched me too." She says,"She ran off with one of the guys in the party and made me cover for her. You know how scary her parents are, it was an absolute nightmare."

I don't respond as she continues to talk,"And Alec. He disappeared half way through the dinner and came back up like after forever and Jake literally ran out when Alec came back. It was all you wasn't it?"

I quirk an eyebrow at her,"All me?"

"Yeah I mean I figured it the moment you disappeared. You like running away from things so I figured that the tension between them was all because of you."

I wanted to say no. I mean honestly a while ago I would have laughed at this situation.

Two boys fighting over me? Pssht, are you high or something?

But this time I couldn't.

"I don't know Rebecca." I say tiredly,"I've had really long day I need to sleep."

She raises an eyebrow suspiciously at me. She knows me well enough to see right through my clear change of subject but I'm grateful when she keeps her mouth shut and nods.

I go on autopilot after that. I get ready for bed like a zombie not registering what I was doing. I changed, brushed my teeth and then fell head first into my bed.

But I can't sleep.

Yeah cause that's just what I need.

After Jake point black asked me to choose Alec over him, more than anything I was hurt.

Which was just flipping ridiculous.

I mean isn't that supposed to make my supposed "choice" easier? Oh god I seriously needed to reevaluate my life.

You know what both of them can go to hell. To hell with Alec who suddenly woke up out of nowhere and said that he loved me.

I mean seriously what bullshit was that?

And then Jake. Don't even get me started on the asshole, I was probably going to have an anyuresim just thinking about him.Well then I would at least get out of this shit.

And Eric.

I don't even want to go near that topic.

I don't think the fact that something like that had actually happened had registered. Honestly in the past few months my life has been a bullet train that my brain forgot to climb on.

I don't know when I fell asleep but the next I know is that I'm woken up rather rudely by Rebecca.

"What?" I say rather snappily rubbing my eyes.

"It's eleven in the morning and Sam is not back." She says,"I'm starting to get worried."

I quickly shake off my morning daze and focus at Rebecca who is sitting on her bed looking anxious.

"Have you tried to call her?" I ask getting out of bed to go brush my teeth.

"Only about a billion times." She responds,"And I'm scared that her parents are going to start calling if they can't reach her."

Samantha Adams has the scariest parents on the planet. They are both extremely qualified professors and have had several of their books published. They are the kind of parents who push Samantha to do everything perfectly, while I study on my accord Samantha is pressurised to do everything. When I visit her is the only time I am grateful that my parents are always in absencia.

There is a knock on the door and Rebecca scrambles off her bed and I quickly wash my face and follow her.

"Sam where were-" She stops mid way when she realises that it wasnt Samantha who was standing at our doorstep but Alec, who was looking straight at me.

"Oh Alec, what are you doing here..." She trails off when she realises that Alec's attention is only on me.

"Hey Rebecca."I say not taking my eyes off Alec,"Don't you have to go?"

"Go where?" She asks dumbly and I glare at her. She laughs weakly,"Oh right."

She then heads towards to the bathroom and I sigh knowing that she is going to be hearing every single word we were going to say.

"We need to talk." Alec says gently when she shuts the door.

My hands get clammy and I honestly can't seem to put two words together so I simply nod and gesture towards the towards the hall.

He nods and I shut the room door behind me. We start walking towards the elevator.

"Nice PJ's." He says giving me slight smile looking at my Hello Kitty! pyjamas.

I smile recalling the fact that two months back when Alec had come into my room I had been wearing the exact same pants.

"So today is the big day, huh?" I say trying to make small talk.

"Yeah my dad can't get more excited." He says,"He deserves this and so does Jeanine they are perfect for each other."

I nod,"I agree. Sometimes you make a mistake the first time."

His eyes darken fractionally and his face becomes slightly paler showing of his bruised nose.

"I'm sorry about yesterday, Jake was out of hand." I say carefully,"Is your nose okay?"

"Yeah, it is." He says,"it was my fault too and I've been through much worse."

I have no doubt. Being a football player hurt.

"Jake had every right to do that." He says and I stop in my tracks,"You are his girlfriend."

Not really.

"I need to tell you something." I say taking a deep breath,"Jake and I aren't really-"

"I know." He interrupts,"Samantha told me."

I raise an eyebrow and am about to ask how Samantha was involved but he starts to say,"The night of the Christmas dance I broke up with Natalie because I was convinced that I was in love with you."

My breath hitches.

"And I kissed you." He says,"That was the first time I lost control, seeing you with him makes me want to pound his face in."

He doesn't look at me,"I have been in love with you since freshman year but I was scared of losing you. I've never had the best track record with girls and you were, still are my rock and every time I even think of being more than what we were or still are I was overwhelmed and terrified with the fact that I may lose you."

"And then Natalie and Michella." He sighs,"I didn't even realise how badly I screwed up but you were still there you were always there until he came. You may have been putting up an act but can you still tell me that this is all still fake?"

I keep quiet.

"I couldn't stand seeing you with him and I understood how selfish I was being after everything I had done to you." He says,"I tried, I tried but then the night of the homecoming dance I realised that I wasn't ready to let you go."

"Alec-"

"I need to say this." He says cutting me off,"I know you like him Clara and I know there is a very high possibility you're going to choose him because I was such a bloody coward all of these years."

"He may not be your boyfriend but he has the balls I never had." Alec finally turns towards me,"I'm going to fight for you Clara this time. I promise. If you choose him I'll back off, I'll be your friend but I won't give up on you just like you didn't all these years."

He stops looking at me with his green eyes. They were much lighter than Jake's, they were deep but readable.

"I love you Clara Wilson."

Oh god.

"Alec-" I start to say but he kisses me, it's short, brief but sweet and I can feel it up till my toes.

"Midnight tonight." He says,"Meet me downstairs in the lobby. If you don't I'll know I'll have to fight harder and wait a little longer."

He gives me one last smile and heads towards the elevator.

Someone clears their throat and I jump to see Samantha standing in the corner her eyebrows raised.

"Clara why are you smiling?" She asks. I look at her for a moment and I know need to ask her something that's bothering me but I can't put my finger on it because I'm still thinking about Alec's kiss.

"I'm smiling because I realised that I don't have to make a choice." I say,"Because there was no choice in the first place. I'd made that choice long back."

--------

The few hours leading up to the wedding was hectic. It involved various fittings and final adjustments to my dress which was made of shimmery gold fabric that matched the color of my hair.

When i was finally ready, I stand in front of the mirror look at the girl who's blue eyes didnt look a dull but shockingly bright against the thick black mascara and her pale face. Her hail was tied with a few curls tumbling out making her look like an old times princess. Bottom line she looked beautiful.

I was that girl.

This time when I saw my reflection I didn't feel that I was looking at someone else this time. Today I felt like myself for the first time in my life. Confident and pretty.

"Clara."

Jeanine soon to be Evans stood in front of me. She was actually glowing in her beautiful wedding dress that was a beautiful mix of gold and satin white. Even I had to admit that my mother had outdone herself, the dress would definitely be the talk of the wedding.

"You look beautiful."I say smiling,"Mr Evans is a very lucky man."

She smiles too,"Thank you Clara, you look very pretty too dear, I was just wondering if you had seen Jake lately?"

My throat constricts as I think about what I have to do after the wedding. My mind flickers back to the last time I had seen him. When he had looked straight at me and told me to choose Alec.

"No, I haven't." I manage to choke out.

She looks disappointed,"Oh. Jake has this terrible habit of disappearing at the worst of times."

Suddenly I start feeling extremely guilty. I realise that yesterday Jake had bailed out of the Rehearsal Dinner because of me and my stupidity. This was probably one of the most important days of his mothers life and he was missing it because he couldn't look me in the eye anymore.

No I'm giving myself to much credit. I mean he wouldn't skip out on something like this because of me.

I don't know why I say it but my mouth goes on autopilot as I look at his mother,"Don't worry about Jake I'm sure he is here, I'll go find him."

I try to give her a reassuring smile but I know there is nothing reassuring about it. I'm terrified of facing Jake after making this decision but I have to talk to him sooner than later.

I preferred later.

I exit the room and crash into my mother on the way out.

"Clara." She regards me carefully and walks straight ahead.

My interaction with my parents have been zero over the past few days. My dad had gone out for a huge meeting to Switzerland and my mom knew better than to try to poke a sleeping dragon.

Yes, I was the dragon.

Michella had gone back to pretending that I didn't exist but I knew she was weary of me. My lie must have worked well enough to make her think that one wrong move and I would blab.

The place where the wedding was going to take place was in the same hotel taking place in a huge hall on the ground floor. It was beautifully decorated in the theme of gold, black and white. Artificial gold creepers climbed the walls while white trees loomed over the place where they would be standing. It was beautifully decorated with fairy lights that looked like shimmering stars.

All in all it was pretty breathtaking.

The people looked even grander this time all of them streaming in, talking to each other. The wedding was due to start in about half and hour and the the reception would take place after which was kind of a New Year's Eve party too.

I try to look for Jake's familiar mop of black hair standing out in the crowd but I can't see him anywhere.

A girl crashes into me almost making me fall but she catches me in the last moment and steadies me.

"I'm so sorry." She says her cheeks completely red,"I have the worst balance ever."

Looking at her flustered face and her blonde hair all over her face I smile.

"Trust me I'm worse."

She laughs,"I highly doubt that."

For the first time in New York I find myself actually liking someone. She was probably my age but she was much shorter. She looked pretty plain for someone who was attending the supposed 'wedding of the year' with her pale blue dress and next to no make up. She was still pretty though but in a different way than most people in the room without the snobby look and a kind smile.

"Hi I'm Clara Wilson." I say thrusting my hand out.

She accepts it,"Oh aren't you Jake Henderson's girlfriend?"

Almost immediately I want to withdraw my hand but she says,"The one who is supposedly to be a total tech genius? I mean obviously you are one your dad is the owner of a whole com-"

She stops herself turning red again,"Sorry about that I have a bad habit of rambling on,I'm Dare Williams."

I raise an eyebrow at her surname. Williams were one of the only competitors of the Hendersons. Maybe a little lower down but definitely catching up.

"Darella hurry up." A sophisticated lady called out from the front. She had one of those really stern expressions that said that she was a perfectionist and she kind of reminded me of my mother just like Dare reminded me of myself.

"Sorry, I have to go." She says,"Nice meeting you though."

And just like that she's gone.

----------------------------

It's like God had heard my wish.

Jake was nowhere to be found and I couldn't be happier but at the same time I was feeling so incredibly guilty due to the fact that he was probably skipping out on his mothers wedding because he was avoiding me.

That was a ridiculous thought wasn't it? Although I was relieved that I didn't have to talk to him and feel guilty over my choice I hated the fact that he was being such a coward. Was he actually hiding in his room because he couldn't face the fact that I would choose Alec over him?

I was half in the mood to go to his room and shake him and ask him what in the bloody hell was wrong with him.

"Miss Wilson, looking for my son I suppose?"

I clench my hands and turn around plastering a fake smile on my face.

Conrad Henderson stood in front of me playing his role perfectly at being the rich businessman in his expensive suit.

"I suppose I'd also have to ask you as to which son now don't I?" He says.

"Alec Evans is not your son." I say through gritted teeth,"He was raised by his actual father a man who actually loved him."

Conrad Hendersons eyes darken at that and he mutters,"I agree and Jake deserved just as much "

I'm actually taken back at his answer. I look at him my jaw slack with surprise.

"Surprised that you don't know everything Miss Wilson?" His smile is polite but his eyes have a hard glint in them as if daring me to say otherwise but I take the smart option out and just kept my mouth shut.

"Jake left quite abruptly, I suppose your little run in with his friends had something to do with that?"

My hands went cold.

"You knew about that?" My tongue tasted like sand in my mouth,"And you let him go?"

"Miss Wilson remind me again but wasn't it you who had asked me to I quote back off?" His tone is jovial and I'm sure other people were under the illusion that we were having a perfectly normal conversation.

"How did you know?" I ask trying my level best to keep my voice down.

"Like I've said before I make it a point to know everything about my son and since you seem to have such an influence on him-"

"Your son could have died." I hiss.

"Jake is all to valuable for that." He says,"No one in their right mind would do anything to him. In fact if anything were to happen it would probably be you who suffered the consequences."

His expression is calculating almost amused and that's when it strikes me.

"You sent Eric after me, didn't you?" I say.

He breaks into a smile,"Very good Miss Wilson. Trust me it wasn't easy, a lot of manipulation had to go into it since I couldn't go directly approach him."

I look at him trying to process what was going on.

"You were trying to get me killed?" I say unbelieving.

"No, no Miss Wilson I think that's very childish. I was looking for more shock and terrify." He says,"But it seems like yesterday's events effected my son more than you."

"That's why Eric didn't touch me." I say slowly,"What did you hope to achieve? I don't back off easily."

"And Miss Wilson neither do I." He says,"I saw exactly what was happening and may I say that you impressed me. Someone threatening you with a knife and you still manage to run that awfully loose mouth of yours."

"You've bugged your sons room." I state trying to put all the pieces of the puzzle together,"You're disgusting."

He laughs at that.

"But then you should now that Eric backed off." I say smiling,"Spencer convinced him to leave so your plan is now down the drain."

His eyes darken and are almost black ,"Unfortunately that part was cut out. "

I laughed,"The bug was in the lamp wasn't it? And when I threw the lamp, it broke. So your plan was a complete bust after all."

"Not if you tell me what the girl said that changed-"

"What makes you think that I know." I say,"In fact what I find amusing is that you actually believe that I'll tell you if I did."

He is about to reply when he is cut off.

"Dad."

You know at times you have to marvel how perfect Jake's timing is.His voice is cold, steely and it's more like a warning than a greeting.

Conrad Henderson smiles,"Hello son, just talking to your girlfriend over here, or have you both already broken up?"

I wonder if Conrad Henderson knows what happened in the balcony yesterday.

"And why would I do anything that would do anything you remotely want?" His eyes flicker at me for a moment and then he forces himself to look back at his father,"We are still together."

I see doubt clearly flashing through his eyes and I'm sure Conrad Henderson did too. Suddenly I can't look at Jake anymore without getting overwhelmed by a whole wave of guilt.

"Clearly." Conrad Henderson says clearly noticing the change in the mood,"I'll go meet your mother and wish her all the best."

"She doesn't need luck dad." Jake says,"She's got enough, after all she got rid of you now didn't she?"

Conrad Henderson smiled,"Well son it's unfortunate you're still stuck here with me." His eyes flicker towards me and then behind me. I turn around to see Alec's green eyes keenly trained on us.

"But it looks like now you're going to be stuck alone." He says smirking,"Trust me you're better off without-"

Jake surges forward with his fist clenched. This time I don't make he same mistake like yesterday and immediately step in front of him and put my hands on his shoulder.

I look into his dark green eyes and say,"Not worth it. Not now. Don't ruin it for your mother today, please."

His eyes immediately lighten and they become softer. He unclenches his fist and steps back.

Conrad Henderson laughs tauntingly,"Is this going to be your legacy? Hiding behind women? I shouldn't be surprised though, you were always such a disappointment as a son."

This time it takes all my self control not to punch him. Again.

"That's good because I am not your son." He says it with such conviction that it's hard not to believe him,"All we share is blood and that's where it ends."

With that Jake turns and leaves.

His father is still smiling as if nothing has happened and that's when I loose it.

"You're going to die alone one day." I say slowly,".You're going to die knowing that the son you had a shot with hates you because of you couldn't get your head out of your ass and for once see what he wants."

I take turn around and walk away with a feeling that I wouldn't be seeing Conrad Henderson any time soon.

____________________

The wedding was beautiful. In fact it was pretty much perfect.

I say that because it passed on without any drama or any awkward situations.I made it all the way down the aisle without tripping so that was a plus.

Also Conrad Henderson was nowhere in sight so it was all in all what I would call amazing.

Jeanine glowed every step of the way and walked with such class and grace that would put Princess Diana to shame. It did help that the person guiding her was her ridiculously handsome son who looked swoon worthy as he handed over his mother to her new husband.

Alec and Michella, the best man and the maid of honour led the ceremony and they looked like something out of a movie both of them gliding down the aisle.

I followed them after that and I managed to look calm and composed the whole time not showing just how terrified I was of tripping and falling.

The ceremony was downright beautiful. When the groom said his vows the bride positively teared up. It was so unbelievably cute that it almost looked like it was scripted.

Through out the ceremony I was painfully aware of the fact that both of the them were standing right in front of me. I was scared to even look up and make eye contact with either of them.

I felt incredibly guilty with my choice even though I knew it was stupid. I mean there was no way he couldn't have seen this coming, he even said that I wouldn't choose him.

But the more I stood there thinking about my choice the more sure I became. What I had told Samantha was completely right. I had made this choice long back and you know what by making this choice I'm doing what's right for me too.

So that's what I told myself through out the reception which was held in one of the banquet halls. Honestly how many halls did this hotel have?

I did my level best not to think about my deadline and I succeed too but that must have had something to do with the fact that I downed at least five glasses of champagne.

"Slow down there." Rebecca says teasingly,"You're going to close the bar this way."

I roll my eyes,"I'll be fine."

Rebecca didn't look convinced but Samantha came right on cue and she was just about as drunk as me.

"Shit." She says grabbing Rebecca by the shoulders and placing her in front of her,"Do you see them?"

I laugh,"No,I think I saw them leaving."

Samantha visibly relaxed and Rebecca shrugged out of her grip.

"A human shield?" Rebecca says,"Really?"

Samantha and I both crack up and Rebecca rolls her eyes,"Well while you losers drown in your misery I have an extremely hot boyfriend waiting for me."

Samantha laughs,"He's probably worse than us, you know?"

Rebecca raised her eyebrows,"That's not possible. Besides I rather hang out with a drunk person who I can make out with."

She then gives us a wink and disappears into the crowd.

"The sad moment when she turns out to be more responsible than both of us put together." She says giggling slightly.

There were tons of speeches given an especially emotional one from the bride where she thanked everyone including Conrad Henderson even though he was not present for being so supportive through out.

It took all my self control not to stand up and yell BULLSHIT!

She then went on to talk about Michella, describing her as the daughter she never had. She then went on to saying thank you to Jake for being there for her all the time.

Jake had to glance at the floor during the entire speech because he couldn't look his mother in the eye as she lied about what a devoted son he was. But you know although Jake has a funny way of expressing his feelings for people, if there was something I was sure about Jake Henderson was that he loved his mom and devoted or not that's what counts.

She then she went and told Alec that she doesn't except to replace his mother but she sure hoped that she could make half the impact his mother would have made.

I smiled at that. Alec deserved this. He deserved a mother who had been so cruelly been taken away from her.

She then went and kissed both Alec and Jake on the cheek and raise her glass and cheered, "To both my sons."

I drank to that though not for their good health. In fact in hopes that the both of them would get amnesia or something and I wouldn't have to make a choice.

After that the party became kind of a blur. If you asked me what happened I would only be able to give sketchy details like me dancing and making fun of people with Samantha.

In the middle of it all I spotted Dare sitting awkwardly next to a boy who liked a fake Superman with glasses in a bright pink shirt. She looked bored as hell so I kind of rescued her and I've never seen someone shoot such a grateful look my way.

We start talking and she tells me how she is also a senior at St Andrews Prep in New York and although she doesn't have a definite path lined up for herself, her parents have already sketched it out for her.

All of a sudden I realise how lucky I was in a way. By giving me the royal ignore my parents had given me a chance to actually grow up away from this snobby world.

Sure I'd be going to work for my dad but that's because I wanted too. Dare on the other hand did not have much of a choice just like Jake didn't.

I asked her if she had any other plans after graduation and she told me that she was planning to go on a road trip to Europe with her best friend.

"If you don't mind me asking." She says,"Why does Jake's step brother keep on looking at your direction?"

My change in expression must have told her enough,"I'm sorry I don't mean to be nosy."

I shake my head,"That's okay I just have-"

"You like both of them?" She looks at me her expression deadly serious.

"Yes." I say sighing.

She nods,"And you can't choose?"

"No, I already have." I say slowly,"I just feel terrible about it."

"Why?" She asks looking genuinely curious.

"I don't know." I say,"I just have this sinking feeling in my gut that I made the wrong decision in this impossible choice."

She raises an eyebrow,"Why impossible?"

"It's because they are so different from each other that I cannot compare them." I say frustrated,"I mean who would you choose between a good guy who you've been after you're whole life, one you know everything about, the one that's kind and sweet but has never batted an eye your way before now."

"Or would you choose the bad boy you know next to nothing about but he brings out another side of you that you never realised was there that makes you feel free and alive. But then there is a high possibility that he will just break your heart into tiny pieces."

She smiles,"Wow you really have made your choice haven't you?"

I look at her surprised,"You figured it out? How? I'm trying to still do it."

"The way you talk about him." She says,"It's pretty obvious who you've chosen and I don't think you should feel guilty about it. As for being scared of getting it wrong, you may get it wrong but who cares? This isn't the SATS make mistakes now it's the only time you're going to get to do it."

I stare at her in shock. I can't believe that this girl is my age, she just seems so much more mature.

"Fifteen minutes left until midnight."

I didn't have to look around to know that Alec had disappeared. Jake had gone long ago and now it was my chance to to make my choice.

I hug her,"Thank you. I need to go now but I hope we meet again."

"Maybe then you'll tell me how it worked out?"

I nod and almost run towards the elevator my choice becoming much clearer with every step I take towards the elevator.

I step into the elevator with a mix of guilt and happiness. I still felt like a bitch for doing this but it would have been much worse I lead them both on.

But I was finally doing it , after all these years I was finally choosing right.

So I pressed the lobby button where I knew I would find Alec.

________________________

"There's five minutes left for midnight."

"I know." I say trying to keep my voice even.

"I thought you would choose him." He says taking a deep breath,"After everything I've done."

"Stop saying that." I say,"I forgave you on the night of homecoming itself and yes there has been times when I doubted myself but can you blame me?"

"Clara but-"

"What are you going to say?" I say my voice rising,"That it's a stupid decision that I should probably get my head checked? You're probably right I should but I've been over every case and every scenario and in each and everyone of them I would choose you."

"Clara that doesn't make it right. You need to go to him now." He says his green eyes looking straight ahead and not at me.

"You know what? You're impossible." I say my voice rising and I walk towards him till I'm right in front of him.

The New Years count down had begun and the roar of all the people lined up in Times Square to watch the ball drop could be heard from here.

10

"How could you tell me to choose him, after everything you've put me through?"

9

"Because you're safer with him." He says quietly looking at me his green eyes dangerously bright.

8

"Don't you get it?" I say looking at him with as much determination as possible,"I don't want safe."

7

"I don't want to be that girl who backs away from everything." I say,"I want to be the girl I'm with you. Fearless and brave."

6

He gives me a faint smile,"You always were fearless and brave."

5

"Not without you." I say,"You make me brave, you make me want to be more than some forgettable good girl."

4

"You are the most infuriating, frustrating and annoying person I know." I continue.

3

"But you have the biggest heart of them all." I say,"And I know that pushing people away from you is your way of caring for them."

2

"You think by pushing me away I'm going to back off?" I laugh,"You're going to have to try a lot harder than that."

1

"Because given this choice again, I'll always choose you." I whisper,"I'll always choose you Jake Henderson , no matter what."

And with that just as the Ball Drops in Time Square I kiss him.

Have you ever felt time just slowing down? Or felt a million fireworks just go pop in your head?

Neither have I.

Until that night.

Kissing him was almost electric and it felt so natural that it was like a reflex action. I knew exactly what I was doing when I kissed him, by roaming my hands through his dark hair while he hoisted me up on his waist and I wrapped my legs around him.

I didn't feel like clumsy Clara anymore. I didn't feel like someone who was stumbling through everything in life trying to find a direction. I felt like I could do anything be anyone as long as he was there.

I would always love Alec just like a part of me would always be clumsy Clara no matter what but the other part needs to face reality and move on.

To Jake.

Maybe I was hoping for too much. Maybe I was being stupid by choosing Jake but I was willing to take the risk.

Because I meant every word I said to him.

He was the most annoying, frustrating hard to get to know guy ever. He made me want to jump off the cliff 99.99% of the time. But that's what made me like him even more.

He stood up for me when no one had, he showed me the part of him that was funny, kind and brave and you know what seeing that was worth putting up for the rest of 99.99% of him.

"Out of breath?" I say teasingly as he pulls away from me breathing heavily.

I still had my legs wrapped around him but he supported my weight easily.

He looked at me his green eyes full of an expression I had finally decoded: lust.

"You're making a big mistake you know that, right?"he says pressing his forehead against mine.

"I think we passed mistake a long time back." I say,"This is downright stupidity."

"Clara I'm not the kind of guy who is-"

"I don't care." I breathe,"I don't care what kind of guy you think you are. So you're not the good boy from next door, so what? I don't want to play it safe anymore."

"I ruin everything I touch Clara." He says,"I'm meant to be like my father alone secl-"

"You are one of the nicest people I know Jake Henderson." I say earnestly,"And honestly after everything it's going to take a hell of a lot effort trying to get rid off me."

"What about Alec?" He asks and my mind flickers back to when I went down to meet him.

"You chose him didn't you?" His expression wasn't one of surprise or anger. It was just a mask of disappointment.

"Yeah I-I did." My voice cracks.

"I was too late?" He says and I can't brings myself to look at him.

I sigh and reply honestly,"Yeah."

He is silent for some time,"I love you Alec but-"

"You're not in love with me." He completes.

I nod slowly and apologize,"I'm sorry-"

"You don't need to be sorry about it, Clara." He says slowly,"I get it. I really do, but I still mean what I said earlier."

"I'm going to back off." He says,"But I'm not going to give up because when he screws up and I know he will screw up I'm going to be there for you. I promise."

I sigh and he kisses me cheek lightly,"Good bye Clara."

"Alec is going to be there waiting For you to screw up."

Jake rolls his eyes and mutters,"Well that's just peachy."

I laugh and wrap my hands around him.

"I don't deserve you." He says.

"Yeah you should probably end up with Spencer or someone." I say jokingly and his eyes darken.

I say softer this time,"What happened yesterday?"

His eyes look troubled as he slowly sets me down,"I don't know what she told Eric. I was honestly too dazed to think straight Eric knocked me around pretty good.but whatever she did just have worked."

"Good." I say,"Because I don't know how much more of your stupid brave act I could take. It gave me a heart attack."

He looks into the distance and says,"Why did you call me here on this balcony of all the places?"

I had sent him a text telling him to meet me in the same balcony he had given me the choice.

When I came up for a horrible moment I thought he wasn't going to show up but he was standing there looking as good as ever.

"I don't know." I say,"It just seemed right."

We keep quiet for a few moments, just taking in the fireworks that had lot up the sky and the massive crowd that was gathered below us.

"You know when I realised that I had already made the choice?" I say softly,"When you told me the truth about Eric and whatever you were into and the fact that I didn't run just proved that I had made my choice a long time back without realising it."

He keeps quiet for a while before finally replying.

"When I came up here I didn't know what to think." He says,"I forced myself to think that it was because you and Alec had hatched some plan to throw me off the balcony but a little part if me dared to hope...."

I kissed him again and this time it was shorter but just as urgent.

"I'm never going to get tired if doing that ." He sighs and for the first time I see him at peace. His green eyes are clear and his face is relaxed as if he is exactly where he wants to be.

"I know neither am I." I say nodding,"But I want to do something else."

He raises an eyebrow,"Is throwing me off the roof still valid?"

I roll my eyes,"You're acting like a two year old."

"Oh please that's two years older than you." He mocks me by repeating the words I had told him when we had gone to dinner together after Jake had made his explosive we are dating announcement.

"No." I say trying to hide my smile,"I meant something else."

He raises an eyebrow as I get a room key card out of my purse and show it to him. At first he is confused but his eyes widen when he understands what I mean to say.

"Are you sure." His eyes are taking in my body top to bottom and they are filled with lust and longing and I know that he wants this just as much as I do.

I lean in teasingly and I whisper,"I'm sure."

Stupid, stupid Clara.

__________________

AUTHORS NOTE

Author: Happy Halloween

Samantha: the only thing scary about today is your grammar.

Author:*mutters* Kill joy ruining all my happiness

Alec: There is nothing happy about today.

Author: Oh don't be such a kill joy, relax honestly this book hasn't ended yet.

Clara:*alarmed* What there is going to be more? I can't handle more.

Author: Oh please we've all seen just how much more you can handle after all you are played by Taylor Swift and let's not forget that she makes her songs based on drama on her life.

Clara: Why do you think she's so popular.

Author: Anyway time for a little bit of self promoting-

Jake:*points at Alec.* I WON HA!

Author:*rolls eyes* tell me why he won again?

Clara: I'm sure you'd find a billion reasons in the comments of the previous chapter.

Author:*scrolls through comments* Okay yeah now I get it.

Jake: Cause I'm that charming.

Author:*glares* anyway as I was saying if you guys haven't read my short story Road Trip To Love please go read it now it barely has ten pages and is super short and is going to be my entry for the Watty Awards.

Which it won!! And Dare, the girl you just met is the main character.

Jake: That's shameless self promotion.

Author: that's what you do in every chapter.

Clara: Anyway a big thank you to everyone who wrote about who I should choose and a special mention to @abbreviation whose thoughts about love were absolutely beautiful (P.S you should be writing this book)

Author: This chapter is dedicated to @ForeverLightandDark for giving such brilliant a answer. That not only fought for Jake's case but also showed Alec not as a villain and jerk but just an underdeveloped character you guys don't know well enough yet. But anyway thank you for all your comments it made my day reading all of them and realising that you guys feel so strongly about this book.

Jake: So don't forget to comment vote and tell us what you think is going to happen next.

Author: Well I'll give you guys a warning he next chapter is going to be rough so hold on tight.

Author: And does anyone have a theory why Alec's character is so underdeveloped till now?

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