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Luca had no idea why people kept moving out of his way.

He was just trying to get to the convenience store to buy some instant ramen, but every time he so much as blinked, gangsters in expensive suits and scarred, tattooed criminals were practically diving out of his path. He waved awkwardly at a guy who looked like he had just walked out of a horror movie. The man actually whimpered and scrambled down a side alley.

"Weird," Luca muttered, scratching his head.

By the time he got to the counter to pay for his ramen and an energy drink, the cashier- a burly guy with a busted nose—was visibly shaking.

"I-it's on the house, Mr. Moretti," he stammered, eyes darting around like he was expecting an explosion.

"Uh, I can pay—"

"FREE," the man squeaked.

"...Alright, thanks?" Luca took his stuff and left, completely baffled.

Meanwhile, across the city, in the penthouse of a heavily guarded skyscraper, Damien Callisto lounged on a couch, casually spinning a knife between his fingers while his underbosses gave their reports.

"We handled the arms deal. The Vasquez Cartel tried to double-cross us, but we reminded them why that's a bad idea."

"Good. Next?"

"There was a minor issue with the Triads, but after a 'friendly conversation,' they've decided to play nice."

"Excellent." Damien yawned. "Anything else?"

One of the men hesitated. "Uh, there's been some... concern about Luca."

Damien's lazy smirk instantly vanished. The entire room tensed. The temperature seemed to drop.

"Explain."

"N-nothing bad!" The man waved his hands frantically. "It's just—he's been walking around unguarded again, and people are nervous. Boss, you know how... unpredictable things get when you're, um, 'concerned' about him."

Damien's intense gaze softened. "Oh, Luca." He sighed, placing a hand over his heart dramatically. "My little chaos magnet."

"I-it's just, uh, last time someone bumped into him too hard, their entire operation mysteriously went up in flames overnight."

Damien chuckled. "Ah, yeah. That was fun."

Everyone in the room nodded nervously.

Damien Callisto was, for lack of a better term, a crazy smartass. He was sharp as a knife, unhinged in the most terrifying way, and absolutely, completely, stupidly in love with Luca Moretti. And when Damien was in love, he was dangerous.

Luca, oblivious to the chaos his mere existence caused, was just trying to eat his ramen in peace when a group of men in black suits suddenly appeared, standing awkwardly outside the convenience store.

One of them, a guy with a scar across his jaw, hesitantly approached. "Uh, Mr. Moretti?"

Luca blinked at him. "Uh, yeah?"

"Would you like an escort home?"

"...Why?"

"No reason, sir. Just... ensuring your safety."

"I'm just eating noodles."

"Yes. And we deeply respect that."

Luca squinted. "Did Damien send you?"

Scar-jaw visibly flinched. "N-no, sir, we would never—"

Luca sighed. "Tell him I don't need a babysitter."

The man paled. "Sir, please, we like our lives."

"Ugh, fine." Luca stood, finishing his drink. "I'm going home, and I don't need a bodyguard."

"Understood, sir. We'll just, uh, casually follow from a distance."

Luca groaned and started walking. The entire group trailed behind him, trying (and failing) to look inconspicuous.

By the time Luca reached his apartment, Damien was already there, reclining on the couch like he owned the place (which, to be fair, he technically did- he'd bought the entire building just so Luca would have "better security").

"Sweetheart!" Damien greeted, arms open. "Come give your beloved a hug."

Luca sighed, dropping his bag. "Damien. Did you send your minions to stalk me again?"

"Of course not." Damien's smirk was positively devilish. "I just made sure the world knows that if anything happens to you, entire bloodlines will mysteriously vanish overnight."

Luca pinched the bridge of his nose. "That's literally worse."

"Oh, love of my life," Damien purred, pulling him into his lap. "You're too pure for this cruel world."

Luca huffed, crossing his arms but not resisting as Damien nuzzled into his hair. "I'm not pure. I just don't want people to act like I'm some fragile prince."

"But you are my fragile prince," Damien cooed.

"I swear to God, if you don't let me live like a normal person-"

"Never."

Luca groaned, but despite himself, he leaned into Damien's warmth. Because, really, for all his dramatics, all his insanity and all the fear he instilled in the underworld, Damien Callisto was just a lovesick fool when it came to him.

And, well...

Maybe being untouchable wasn't the worst thing in the world.

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