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Story plot: Everyone knows how shy and reserved Yeosang can be, what they don't know is the reason behind it. Yeosang is becoming more and more reserved. He doesn't speak up anymore and he seems exhausted. Everyone is getting worried and they want to know what's going on because they care about their Yeosangie.

The things they love the most about Yeosang is the fact that he's so sweet, loving, reserved and he's obsessed with cuddling.

They're all cuddling on the couch and Yeosang is lying quietly in Hongjoong's arms. "You okay Sangie? You're quiet today." Yeosang nods as he pulls the blanket up to his chin. Hongjoong places a soft kiss on the top of his head and brushes up and down Yeosang's arm. "Is our baby a little bit sleepy?" Mingi asks and Yeosang nods. "Shall I tuck you in?" Wooyoung offers and Yeosang nods again.

Technically I'm not lying. I am exhausted. Just not because I'm tired in the way they think I am.

As Wooyoung brings Yeosang to bed, Hongjoong sits up on the couch. "Am I the only one who notices that our baby seems more quiet than usual the past week or so? All he wants to do is cuddle with one of us, but he doesn't talk or laugh as much as he used to do. You know not as much as when we got together." "Yeah I talked to him about that yesterday, but he just said the schedule is making him feel tired because he tries to practice as much and hard as possible." Yunho says from the other side of the couch. "Ah well let's pay more attention to that." "Yeah I don't want our baby to be so exhausted everyday." Jongho says and blushes slightly.

"And he's off to wonderland!" Wooyoung says as he drops back down on the couch. "As soon as I tucked him in he fell asleep." "Yeah Yunho said he's tired because the schedule is asking a lot from him." "Ah let's make sure he doesn't push himself too much, I miss cuddling with our baby at night." They all agree. Everyone misses the late night cuddles with Yeosang.

As soon as Wooyoung shut the door, Yeosang opens his eyes. Memories come flashing back as soon as he closes them. He hasn't told anyone about the flashbacks. He's having a hard time sleeping because the images that flash in front of his eyes haunt him and keep him awake.

The next day during practice, Seonghwa walks over to his little Sangie. He pulls him down on the ground on his lap. "No more practicing if we have a break baby. Did you get some sleep last night?" "Yeah a little." Yeosang smiles as he snuggles into the comfort of his boyfriends arms.

Jongho walks over to them and sits down as well to kiss Yeosang's cheek. "You still look really tired baby.. You want me to go back to the dorms with you? I think you've practiced enough for today." Seonghwa smiles, loving how much everyone cares about Yeosang as much as he does. "Yeah I agree with Jongho baby, maybe you should go with him and get some rest." "No no it's okay really. I just need to eat and drink something and I'll be okay. I'll go to bed early tonight."

"Are you sure baby?" Seonghwa asks and Yeosang nods as he opens his sandwich to eat it. "I'm sure, but you guys are really sweet." Yeosang smiles and kisses each one of them.

I can't be alone with them and fall asleep. That will not happen. I will not allow that to happen.

After their break they practice for a couple more hours before making their way back to the dorms. "I'm going to take a shower and then go straight to bed." Yeosang says as he kisses each boyfriend softly on their lips. "Do you want any of us to tuck you in baby?" Hongjoong asks and Yeosang blushes slightly. "Yeah.." "I'll do it!" Mingi shouts and they all laugh.

After Mingi has tucked him in, Yeosang opens his eyes again and snuggles in his blankets.

He was not supposed to be there 3 weeks ago. I would never see him again. How did he find me?

Yeosang decides to grab his diary again after years of not using it and he starts to write. Maybe he should talk to his boyfriends about this. He's everything but happy at this point and since he's unable to sleep he feels exhausted all day long.

Why did he have to ruin everything? I was doing so well. Just seeing him. Staring at me with that look in his eyes that was way too familiar to me. Why?

As another draining week passes by, Yeosang is crying himself to sleep every night. It's the only way he can fall asleep at this point. Everyone notices that their boyfriend is not doing well, but they can't seem to get him to open up about it. Until one night.

Wooyoung tucked in his boyfriend again and went to his own room to sort out his closet, because he turned it into a big pile of clothing. As Wooyoung is sorting out and folding his clothes he hears sounds coming from his boyfriend's room.

Yeosang cried himself to sleep again, but the past few day he's been suffering from very vivid nightmares. The flashbacks turn into real life dreams.

"No get off me! Get off me!" Yeosang shouts and Wooyoung looks up. "NO!" Wooyoung quickly drops his clothes and enters his boyfriend's room, shutting the door behind him. "Sangie, Sangie baby it's me. It's Wooyoung baby." He shakes his boyfriend carefully who sits up, drained in sweat and looking panicked.

Wooyoung quickly wraps his arms around him. "I heard you screaming baby.. Did you have a bad dream?" Yeosang is still breathing heavily as he holds tightly onto Wooyoung and nods. "Who needed to get off you baby?" Yeosang swallows hard as he remembers his dream. "I- I don't remember.." Wooyoung cups Yeosang's face in his hands and kisses him softly. "It's okay it was just a bad dream baby." 

No it wasn't.

Yeosang nods as he snuggles into Wooyoung's arms. After a while, Wooyoung tucks him in again, placing a soft kiss on his forehead. "Now sweet dreams only hm?" Yeosang smiles and nods. "Yeah sweet dreams only. I love you Woo." "I love you too Sangie." Wooyoung smiles and places another kiss on his boyfriends forehead before exiting the room again.

Something about this just doesn't seem right to Wooyoung, but he can't really pinpoint his feelings.

He walks downstairs and drops down on the couch. "Guys I think we really need to push Sangie a little more into talking to us.. I was just folding my clothes and I heard him screaming and he said he had a bad dream but.. I don't know I feel like that's not just it if you know what I mean.. It feels like there is something going on that he's not telling us. Our schedule has been pretty easy because we already did the major practices but he still looks exhausted.."

"So maybe we should give him cuddles tomorrow and try to get him to talk then?" Yunho suggests. "I think he's always comfortable in Hongjoong's arms and having us all around him, so maybe we should go for that? And then hopefully find out why he's getting more and more reserved since a few weeks." Mingi says and they all agree.

Yeosang got up early. He was awake since 4 in the morning and he was tired of just laying in his bed. Soon, Seonghwa makes his way downstairs to make breakfast as he sees Yeosang sitting on a chair at the kitchen island.

He walks up to him and wraps his arms around him from behind, giving him a gentle back hug before placing a few small kisses on his neck. "What are you doing here so early baby?" Yeosang shrugs. "I couldn't sleep so I decided to just get out of bed." Yeosang turns around in his chair and snuggles into his boyfriend's arms.

I can't do this anymore. They need to know.

"H- hyung, can I talk to you all?" Seonghwa steps a little closer wrapping his boyfriend safely in his arms. "Of course baby, we actually wanted to talk to you as well." Yeosang looks up. "Y- you do?" "Yeah we're all a bit worried about you angel.." Seonghwa says as he leans down and kisses his boyfriend softly.

After breakfast, they all decide to stay in their comfortable pyjamas as they all cuddle in the living room. Yeosang is snuggled up under his blanket in Hongjoongs arms. Somehow, being in the arms of his leader makes him feel extra safe.

Seonghwa notices that Yeosang is struggling to speak up so he helps him out a little. "Sangie you told me you wanted to talk to all of us about something?" Hongjoong looks down at his boyfriend, wrapping his arms around him just a little tighter as Yeosang nods.

Tell them.

Yeosang looks up at everyone and then avoids any eye-contact when he starts talking.

"Y- you guys were right.. I am tired but.. It doesn't have anything to do with the schedule.. I've told you guys that I was with this guy before I became a trainee right?" The others nod.

"So.. At the time I didn't believe it but, it was a toxic relationship.."

"What do you mean with toxic baby?" Jongo asks carefully as he brushes his boyfriend's leg softly from the other side of the couch.

"Well.. Woo, remember when I had that bad dream?" "Mhm." "It wasn't really a bad dream.."

Yeosang sighs wishing it wasn't so hard to tell them. "You can talk to us baby it's okay, take your time." San says and Yeosang flashes a small smile again.

"So we were really in an on and off relationship because uhm.. He hurt me.. Emotionally, physically a- and sometimes even sexually.." Yeosang swallows hard, blinking the tears away as everyone remains completely silent. "A- and he showed up at a stage a couple of weeks ago.. He was right there. Front row. Staring right at me w- with the same look he always has when he was about to break me down in a billion pieces. I- I don't want to do stages anymore. I don't want to see him again guys."

And at this point Yeosang breaks down into tears. "I'm so scared that he's after me again!" He cries out and holds onto his blanket tightly.

"Sangie.." Hongjoong speaks softly as he holds him closer than ever. Everyone quickly gathers around wrapping the both of them in a tight group hug.

"Baby.. You shouldn't struggle with these feelings alone.. We're always here to protect you. You're our angel now and there is no guy or girl on this planet that will every hurt you ever again." San says.

"I'm so proud of you for talking to us baby. I know it might not have been easy to talk about something like this, but we are so so proud of you!" Mingi says and places a small kiss on Yeosang's hand.

"You tell us as much as you want baby.. Even if it takes you weeks or months to tell everything. We'll always be here to listen okay?" Jongho says and smiles softly.

Yeosang nods as he rubs the tears from his eyes. "W- would you sleep with me? L- like taking turns?"

"Of course baby no doubt we will! If that will make you sleep better and feel safe we will. We love cuddling and sleeping with you angel." Seonghwa says creating a small smile to form on Yeosang's face again.

"I- I promise I will tell you guys more over time."

"You take as long as you need angel. For now, we have a day off. You can tell us whatever you want to do." Hongjoong says and Yeosang looks up. "Honestly.. This is perfect.. Cuddling with you all. That's all I need."

"Cuddles and kisses it is!" Wooyoung shouts and everyone chuckles.

Finally the words are out. I did it. I honestly didn't think I would feel this relieved about it. But damn I'm glad I did it.

A/N: Fourth OT8 oneshot! I hope you guys liked it!

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