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*Jace's POV*

I paced my room that evening, trying to clear my head and rid it of all the thoughts of tonight's potential events. It wasn't working. In fact, it only made things harder.

What was Shane thinking?

I looked at my clock and it was about ten minutes to seven. With a sigh and

frustrated groan, I dragged myself to my closet. I hadn't even made up my mind yet when Gwen's strong voice rang out through the house.

"Jason!"

I rolled my eyes. She knew I hated being called by my full name. Mom usually called me that when she was irritated with me, so I gave myself the

nickname Jace. Hardly anyone knew I was Jason. I wanted to ignore her but another yell came from her, "Shane's on his way up!"

I gasped. What? I didn't hear the bell ring! Did he knock? Most likely. I grumbled under my breath and flew out of my closet. By the time I opened

my door, Shane reached my room with a giant smile on his face.

It fell as soon as he realized I wasn't ready.

"Hey, Jace... you're, um..." he motioned at my body. "Not getting ready? You're still in sweats."

"I know. I was trying to see that if I didn't get ready, you wouldn't take me to your place..."

He stepped closer to me, staring me down. "My beautiful darling, if you

don't put on a casual shirt and jeans, I'll strip and dress you myself."

I stepped even closer, closing the distance and taking his challenge. "My dear Anteros, that isn't a threat. That's a favor."

I felt his hands at my waist. "I'd rather just do the stripping part," he whispered seductively.

"Well, get to it," I whispered back. He gripped my shirt and pulled it up over my head.

"How long has it been since I told you how amazing your body was?" He asked, digging his thumbs in the band of my jeans.

"Too long," I responded, my body growing hot as he shoved my pants down. He didn't touch my boxers, making me raise an eyebrow. "One more left."

'Nah, I think you need that one."

I felt like my body was going to explode.

"Get dressed," he said in my ear, making me shiver.

"You, Anteros, are a tease."

"I know you're obsessed with Greek gods, but I don't know the first thing about them."

I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. "They're hot. Most of them, at least."

"Wow, Jace. You're gayer than I am." He pecked my forehead and reiterated his order for me to get ready.

"You're picking Nolan up?" I asked.

Shane sighed. "He's downstairs."

My eyes bulged. "You're shitting me, right? We're over here messing around and he's downstairs?"

"Jace, I'm breaking up with him tonight. I have to. I have to," he emphasized.

I stared at him. "Okay, but right now- at this moment, you're still together, so just..." I shook my head. "I gotta throw some clothes on."

Shane nodded, hurt that I was pushing him away. "Alright, hurry." He gave me one last look - a longing one - before giving me my privacy.

*

I took a deep breath as I descended the very last stair, stepping foot into the living room where Nolan and Shane were seated right next to each other.

Nolan stood up at the sight of me, and although he had a smile on his face,

he seemed down. "How've you been, Jace?" he asked. I smirked.

"Hey, Nolan." I slapped his back. "I'm good. What's up?"

"Shane said we were going to his place. I don't really know what for."

My smirk dropped. "He um... I know we're having dinner with him."

"Ohh," Nolan nodded, brightening up. "It should be fun. From what Shane told me, Tyler might be there."

"Yeah, and Darren," I grumbled.

Nolan chuckled. "You two still can't get along?"

"I can tolerate him." I shrugged. "But he was an ass to Shane. Shane can forgive that, but I won't."

Shane stood up at that moment. "Should we get going?"

"Yeah!" Nolan exclaimed, suddenly excited. I wanted to puke. If only he knew it wasn't just a dinner with the fam.

"I'll be back later, Gwen."

She crossed her arms. "No fair. I wanna come along."

"Do you even know where we're going?" I asked.

"Well, Nolan's with you guys so I know it's nothing bad and that I'd be safe."

Nolan grinned at her. "Throw on a jacket."

Gwen cheered and rushed up the stairs. "Love you!" She yelled to Nolan on her way up. He looked at Shane to make sure it was okay and he gave a simple nod.

"It's cool. There'll be plenty of food. I'm gonna be in the car."

"I'll come with you." Nolan locked his fingers with Shane's and they headed out the door. I smiled sadly after them.

This was my fault. I hated being a part of Nolan's heartbreak. He'd been dating Shane for almost an entire year, and I knew that it would be hard for him to let Shane go.

"Gosh, Jace. Stop checking out the wall and let's go. You can fuck it later." I glared at my sister as she flew out the front door, then I went after her, grabbing the house keys on my way out.

"Anyone got headphones?" I asked once we were on the road.

"What? My classical music too sophisticated for you?" Shane teased from the driver's seat. I rolled my eyes playfully.

"You got that backwards, Cooper."

Shane chuckled. "Nolan, can you check the glove compartment for spare earphones?"

Nolan, who had a tight grip on his seatbelt, mustered up the courage to do as Shane said.

"Poor guy," Gwen whispered softly, so that only I could hear. She knew he had a severe phobia of being on the road like this, especially for long distances.

Sometimes I wished I could get into his head, and feel what he felt. It wasn't easy, but I could tell that he comforted himself with the knowledge that Shane was right beside him.

"Here, Jace," Nolan handed me the earphones with slightly shaking fingers before leaning back in his seat again and gripping his seatbelt.

"Thanks, man," I appreciated.

Shane released a hand from the wheel, placing it on Nolan's lap. I couldn't be jealous; I knew it was a sign of comfort. When I saw Nolan's grasp slowly relax, I smiled.

I'm a way, what I did was right. Shane was Nolan's rock, and that was a plus.

I guess the whole gang was here. Well, Shane's whole gang. Of course, there was his mother and step father Ryan, Darren, Tyler, and Shane's

cousin Elaine or Elly for short.

Most of us shared hugs before taking seats at the dining table. There were nine of us, so we had to pull up extra chairs and fit them around the table.

"I feel like this is Thanksgiving," Tyler remarked. "Someone remind me why the hell we're having a huge dinner."

"Someone remind me why the hell you're even here," Gwen retorted, picking up a French fry.

"Uh-uh-uh!" Mrs. Kables slapped Gwen's hand. "Let everyone get settled."

I felt something wet on my hand and looked down to see Jasper, a golden retriever, licking it. "Hey, boy." I petted his soft fur and he nuzzled my hand.

I was sitting across Shane, who was right next to Nolan.

"Alright, everyone can grab a plate and take what you want," Ryan informed.

"Sweet mama!" Gwen exclaimed, eyeing the buffet on the table. I didn't have that much of an appetite, but the food looked very tempting.

"You guys gotta come over more often!" Mrs. Kables told me and Gwen. "I get tired of seeing Shane's and Darren's faces all the time." She grinned.

"Wow, Mom. How sweet of you," Shane shot in a sarcastic tone.

"Anyway!" Elly began. "On to more important topics, school's tomorrow and we're gonna be seniors! I'm so excited. Like, I literally have my entire year planned out."

"You mean you're entire prom?" Darren corrected. Elly shot him a look.

"I have to be prom queen. Seriously, if I let that Amanda chick beat me, it's gonna be Carrie all over again."

"So, you're gonna dump pig blood all over her and she's gonna kill the entire town and set the school on fire?" Nolan asked.

"Pretty much."

"And then there'd be no school?" Darren added. "I like this idea. That being said, I hope she wins."

"Hey, um, Nolan, are you going to prom?" Elly asked. I knew she used to like him a lot, but I was sure she'd gotten over him. It has been about a year. "I know that... you said you were never going to another dance."

Nolan sighed. "I don't... I'm not exactly sure."

"You should go. Really. And to homecoming."

Shane put an arm around Nolan. "He'll cross that bridge when he gets there, El."

"Am I crossing that bridge alone?" Nolan asked Shane, releasing himself from his hold. It seemed that the side conversations hushed as everyone knew what that question entailed.

I could see Shane quickly trying to think of the right words.

"Um, Jace," Mrs. Kables called me, turning the attention to me. "How's uh, how's your Dad doing? Treating you guys okay?"

The woman was practically a life saver. I saw Shane's tensed body relax.

"Yeah, he's fine. He's seeing this woman that he can't stop talking about," I answered.

"Aw, that's good for him. Who is she?"

"Does she have kids of her own?" Ryan added to his wife's question.

"Her name's Joanna, and yeah, she's got two kids." I rolled my eyes. "I'm not a big fan of her. She's sweet."

"Sweet's good, right?" Tyler spoke up.

"Too sweet."

"Oh. Eugh!" he grimaced. "That's practically my aunt when she sees me every year. I don't know but she's all like -" He used Darren to

demonstrate, and started running his fingers up his arms while imitating a

high-pitched woman's voice. "Oh, Ty-baby! Look at you, all grown up. Come give your favorite aunt a big giant hug - oh, my little snuggle bun."

Everyone was silent before we burst out laughing. Tyler rolled his eyes. "I feel your pain now."

"Exactly. Like she pinches my cheeks every time she sees me," I scoffed.

"Who wouldn't wanna pinch your cheeks?" Shane responded. I tried my best to hide my embarrassment when I realized the hidden meaning behind that. Basically everything Shane said had a double meaning.

And right in front of Nolan. Looked like I wasn't the only idiot around here.

"Anywayyy, I think I'm rejoining the football team this year," Tyler announced, changing the subject. "Darren's been convincing me, and it seems that the guys want me back. Which is only fair, since a couple of

them are gay. Ahem - Kaleb- achoo!"

"Babe, you don't say ahem then achoo," Darren told his boyfriend.

"Well, that's how I do it and you love my flaws so get over it."

"Ty -"

"No, don't try to cheer me up. I'm gonna be mad at you for the rest of dinner so that we can have angry sex later because that's when it's the

best." He used his fork to pretty much stab his food to death.

I dropped my own fork, his words making me lose my appetite completely. I looked at Nolan to see his spoon hovering over his food, as if he was thinking. His blue eyes snapped up towards me and he put the spoon down, then stood up.

"I'm gonna get some fresh air. Excuse me." He put his napkin on the table before standing up and heading upstairs, most likely to the balcony.

"Something's wrong with him," Gwen said in a quiet tone. She looked at me then Shane. "You two had better fix this!"

"We will." Shane stood up and nodded at me. "Come on."

I felt my heart drop as I slowly stood up. "R-right." I cleared my throat and

followed him up the stairs. "You're sure about this, Shane?" I queried. "He

seems pretty upset."

Shane faced me. "I'm doing this now while he has us and everyone downstairs to comfort him."

"Shane, I know we want each other, but you're handling this the wrong way. Do you even care about his feelings anymore?"

"Of course I do." He took my hand. "But I care about yours so much more, Jace. That's why I won't let you do this. I'm fixing your mistake, and I'm taking the blame for everything. The longer we wait, the harder it gets. And

we've been waiting for way too long." He caressed my cheek with his thumb, his gray eyes piercing my hazel ones.

"So... what do I say?" I asked, putting my trust in him.

"Just follow my lead. Trust me, I didn't think about what to say either because I want it to come from my heart. He deserves that."

I nodded and he released my hand.

I knew it wasn't going to be easy, but I didn't think it'd be this difficult. When Nolan turned around to face us on the balcony, it was as if he knew what was coming. I could tell he was trying to hold himself together as he looked at me and Shane.

"I just needed some air, sorry," he whispered.

"No, it's cool. Take your time," Shane responded patiently. We were silent for a couple moments before Nolan sucked in a deep breath.

"I guess you didn't come just to check up on me," Nolan stated.

Shane stepped forward. "We wanted to talk to you, Nolan."

Though the moonlight was the only thing that illuminated the balcony, I

could clearly see the slight fear in Nolan's eyes. It made me feel horrible that I couldn't even understand what he was going through, or what he must be feeling right now. He was about to hear the person he loved say

that he couldn't return those feelings wholeheartedly.

"Jace and I have been talking about it for a while now," Shane started, and I caught Nolan's fingers tremble before he put his hands behind his back. "And we want -"

"We want your help," I interrupted. Nolan's eyes tore from Shane and landed on me as I walked in front of Shane.

"My help?"

"Well, yeah." I managed a chuckle and playfully punched his arm. "Duh,

silly. We're throwing a party."

"You are?"

"We are?" Shane asked, grabbing my arm and turning me so I could look at him. I nodded quickly. "Yes, idiots. Listen, it's gonna be this Saturday and we can't use my house because obviously, it's fifty minutes away and Louisburg isn't the party

scene, let's be real. We wanted to know if we could use your place."

Nolan slowly shrugged. "I mean... I can ask my mom... what about Shane's house?"

"What about it?" I raised an eyebrow.

"My mom has a thing, so..." Shane lied, biting on his lip. I knew he was only playing along for my sake, and I also knew he'd be pissed.

"Oh, okay. What's this party for? Like a back-to-school thing?" Nolan inquired.

"Something like that. Plus we're seniors now and this is the first week. Everyone's practically dead, so we just wanna liven things up. What better way than to throw a party that everyone will talk about for a long time?"

"Jace, you... you don't go to Dawson High anymore."

"So? There are a lot of people I miss. Plus, I'll bring some of my friends and you could finally meet them. It'll be fun, trust me. Let us use your house, and I'll clean up. You won't have to worry about a thing." I raised my eyebrows and he sighed.

"Fine."

"Great, so party's on. Fantastic," Shane stated satirically. He gave me one

last look before leaving us by ourselves.

Nolan shut his eyes and hung his head. "You didn't have to," he whispered, raising his head again.

"I know," I replied quietly. "I just kept trying to imagine how you must feel, and I couldn't."

"You know, Jace... if he doesn't end it... then I will. You wanna know how I felt? Sad, heartbroken, terrible, all that depressing stuff. Yes, but I was also a bit relieved. That I didn't have to be the one to do it." He wiped at his

eyes. "I appreciate you, but stop pitying me. It's making things hard."

My eyebrows pulled together. "I'm sorry. I just... I have to look out for you."

"Thank you, but when's the last time you looked out for Shane or thought about how he felt?" he questioned.

That took me by surprise. The more I thought about it, the more it occurred to me that I'd been pushing Shane and his own feelings behind me while he put mine first. Why couldn't I figure that out on my own? Why did someone have to remind me? What was wrong with me?

"I didn't mean to be such a burden to you or him, Jace, and I'm so sorry for that. I'll walk home."

I was left speechless as a couple tears stained his cheeks and he hurried out of sight.

*******

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