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I just finished a stupid assignment on volleyball and it 1:35am so I thought that I should reward myself by rewarding you. Have an update!

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Vic's POV

I sigh softly to myself as I drive back towards home. College was a bust. Maybe I'll try again next year. Or maybe I'll just be a college dropout forever. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't study, I couldn't concentrate in class, I didn't get any assignments done and my roommate hated me. Why? Because of Kellin Quinn Bostwick. He was on my mind constantly. When I was in class, all I was doing was thinking about him. When I was studying, I was thinking about him. When I was supposed to be sleeping, I was thinking about him. There wasn't a minute in the day when he wasn't on my mind. I got so sleep deprived that I'd pass out. It was horrible. Now I understand why Mike didn't want me to go. Heck, my roommate even got sick of me. He said I was too sad.

At first, I was angry at Kellin all over again because he was always on my mind, making me into this person and I for some reason thought that it was his fault. But then as the days turned into weeks, I realized that I just really fucking miss him. I knew this feeling wasn't going to leave anytime soon and I couldn't go through college like that so I just dropped out. But now, I'm back at square one. No Kellin; no happiness; no meaning.

Having gone to college in LA, I still have another two or so hours to go until I get home. That's a lot of time alone, to think, just like how I used to think back before I had met Kellin. It makes it worse because today is Valentine's Day. The day to express your love to that special someone and the day I first laid eyes on Kellin Quinn. It's been an entire year. So much has happened and just like I was at this time last year, I'm miserable. It's like nothing has changed at all yet I know that everything has.

I try to get Kellin off of my mind for a bit just thinking about seeing Mike again and how disappointed he's going to be in me because I dropped out. It works for a little bit but then my thoughts come full circle and I find myself thinking about Kellin again.

Part of me wishes that I had never met him but I know that if I had never met him then I wouldn't be who I am today. He brought me happiness but sadly he also took it away.

I decide to turn the radio on to distract myself. Then I hear his voice. I shake my head. God I must be really sleep deprived. But then I realise it's coming from the radio.

"We're live from backstage with Kellin Quinn, the singer of Sleeping With Sirens. We just played With Ears To See and Eyes To Hear off of their new acoustic EP, If You Were a Movie, This Would Be Your Soundtrack. Kellin, can you tell us what that song was about and why you wrote it?" The radio presenter asks and I listen intently. I didn't know they brought out new music.

"Um, yeah." It's almost like he's sitting next to me as he speaks. "Most people think that it was about someone who screwed me over."

"Well that's what it sounds like. The lyrics are 'so tell me how does it feel, how does it feel to be like you, I think your mouth should be quiet 'cause it never tells the truth'." The radio presenter says.

My stomach clenches. Is this about me? Or did someone else hurt him? I'm so confused.

"The lyrics are more directed at myself." He says and I raise my eyebrows surprised. "I didn't so much as lie but more kept something from someone I loved very much. The songs about being angry with myself."

Hearing him talking about being angry at himself makes me feel unbelievably guilty. He shouldn't feel that way. I'm the one that should be angry with myself not him.

"Well now we know." The presenter says. "Next up is the fourth track from the EP; Don't You Ever Forget About Me."

Music starts playing and I listen intently.

"The hardest thing I'd ever do

Is say goodbye and walk slowly away from you.

But I'll do it

And after all this time I shared with you

It seems unfair to leave with nothing more than blank stares

But I'll do it

If it's for the best then I wish you well

If it helps to say our life was a living hell

Well then do it

Then do it

Then do it." Hearing his singing again brings tears to my eyes. I've missed his voice so much. I refused to listen to his music. I couldn't handle it and I still can't. I shouldn't be crying whilst I'm driving. I blink away the tears and take a deep breath.

"Don't you ever forget about me

When you toss and turn in your sleep

I hope it's because you can't stop thinking about

The reasons why you close your eyes

I haunt your dreams at night

So you can't stop thinking about me

Don't stop thinking about me."

"Oh Kell, I never did." I breathe out.

"Do you really think you could see this through

Put on a smile and wear it for someone new

Don't you do it

'Cause I know I'm not the easiest one to love

But every ounce I have

I invest in you

But no one said love's not for taking chances."

Okay that part really got to me. I pull over on the side of the road and rest my head on the steering wheel as I start crying.

"So don't you ever forget about me

When you toss and turn in your sleep

I hope it's because you can't stop thinking about

The reasons why you close your eyes

I haunt your dreams at night

And so you can't stop thinking about me, can't stop thinking about me"

I can't control the sobs that escape from my throat. I wonder if he wanted me to hear this.

"Will you take me back in the morning

If I promise to never act this way again

Oh Oh

'Cause I'm so bad at being lonely

But I don't know how, don't know how

I don't know how."

Does he want me back or is he just saying that? Because I'll take him back any day.

"So don't you ever forget about me

Don't you ever forget about me

Don't you ever forget about me

When you toss and turn in your sleep

I hope it's because you can't stop thinking about

The reasons why you close your eyes

I haunt your dreams at night

So you can't stop thinking about me, don't stop thinking about me

Just close your eyes

And fall asleep tonight."

The song finishes and I let a few more sobs out before I decide to pull myself together.

"So what's that song about? It sounds deep and personal." The presenter asks.

"No comment." Kellin replies quickly.

There's a little awkward silence. I guess they were expecting an answer. I know what that song is about and I might be one of the only people in the world.

"Okay...well the next song is the third track from the EP. It's called Stomach Tied In Knots. Kellin, you have to leave us now because your playing a show in half an hour, right?" She asks.

"Yes. We're playing in San Diego at Viejas arena. There's two more dates and very few tickets left. So make sure you get some tickets fast and come out to the shows."

"Now before you go, we heard a rumour that there's going to be a brand new song being played tonight. Is that true?" She asks.

"Yeah, it is. I only wrote it about an hour ago so it'll probably be terrible." Kellin explains with a laugh and I chuckle at that. Typical Kellin. He puts down every one of his songs and so far they've all been amazing.

"Well, that was Kellin Quinn from Sleeping with Sirens. Here's Stomach Tied in Knots." She announces as the song starts playing.

I need to get to that show. I need to see him. Whether he wants me there or not.

I pull the car back onto the road as I start driving a little faster than before. I need to see him.

"Oh, my stomach's tied in knots

I'm afraid of what I'll find if you want to talk tonight

Oooo Oooo

See the problem isn't you, it's me I know

I can tell, I've seen it time after time

And I'll push you away

I get so afraid, oh no

And I can't live without you now.

Oh-oh

I can't even live with myself

Oh-oh-oh

And I can't live without you now

Oh-oh

And I don't want nobody else

Oh-oh-oh

I only have myself to blame

But do you think we can start again

'Cause I can't live without you..."

"I'm coming Darling." I whisper to myself as I hear the pain in his voice when he sings.

I hope it's not too late.

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Let's all be thankful that I have no friends because I wrote this at lunchtime because I had nothing better to do.

I hope everyone enjoyed this. Let me know what you thought. Vote/comment/follow. This is probably going to be finished soon.

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