Chapter 28: Chapter 27

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I pull up in front of the venue. The show is probably nearly over but I don't care. I need to get in there. I look up at the night sky, noticing that the moon is shining extra bright tonight. I get out of the car and run up to the entrance of the venue but am stopped by a security guards as I try to enter.

"You have a ticket kid?" He asks and I shake my head. "Then you can't come in."

"But I need to get in. I'll buy a ticket." I say hopefully.

"We're all sold out kid." He explains and I huff.

Fuck what do I do? I get an idea and pull out my wallet, pulling out all the cash in there. There's just over a thousand dollars.

"I'll give you all my cash. Please just let me in."

He takes it out of my hands and counts it up before standing aside. He nods towards the door and I thank him before rushing into the venue. God I hope I'm not too late. I walk into the back of the crowd and find it hard to see the stage because of all the people. But I hear his voice.

"So this is a brand new song. I wrote this just before the show so forgive me if it's shit. But yeah, this song is for someone special. We met a year ago today. Though he's no longer in my life." He says before swallowing hard making my heart sink.  "Long story short, I fucked up."

There's a short silence before he clears his throat.

"I want you all to promise me something right now. I want you all to promise me that when you find that special someone, that person that you love more than life itself, promise me that you'll never let them go. Promise me that you'll always put them before anything else." He says, his voice wobbling and cracking.

"We promise Kellin." The crowd choruses and Kellin lets out a little chuckle.

"Good. This song is called 'Sorry'." he says then a piano starts playing and he starts singing.

"I've been thinking lately about you and me,

And all the questions left unanswered,

How it all could be.

And I hope you know,

You never left my head,

And if I ever let you down,

I'm sorry."

Tears start making their way down my face and I start weaving through the crowd.

"I see you around here lately,

You smile brighter than you should.

And me I've been so lonely,

I'm glad you're doing good.

'Cause I can't forget,

The way it used to be,

And if I ever let you down,

Well I'm sorry."

I push past people, probably a little too aggressively but I need to get to the stage. I get glimpses of him as I get closer. He looks gorgeous as always.

"Whoa-oh

No I can't let you go...

And you know that you can take all of me,

I swear I will be better than before,

So sing it back.

Whoa-oh." The crowd starts singing along and I get near the front of the stage.

"No I can't let you go." I get to the barrier and some girl looks at me pissed off.

I stare up at Kellin, desperate to get seen, and I do. He spots me and looks at me shocked and saddened. He continues singing staring at me the entire time.

"I'm sorry for the things I've done,

Things I've done.

I'm sorry for the man I was,

And how I treated you.

I'm sorry for the things I've done,

Things I've done.

I'm sorry for the man I was,

And how I treated you."

Suddenly, someone grabs my arm and the crowd screams loudly. I look and realize it's Justin.

"Come on." He yells over the screams as he pulls me over the barricade.

Kellin watches curiously as he continues to sing. Justin pulls me around side stage before leading me onto the stage. The crowd cheers but I don't care. I'm too busy watching Kellin. I stop about two meters away from him.

"No I can't let you go." He sings his voice cracking as tears fall down his face.

"And you know that you can take all of me,

I swear I will be better than before,

So sing it back.

Whoa-oh

No I can't let you go."

The music starts slowing down and Kellin slowly walks closer to me. He stops in front of me and reaches up, cupping my face a brushing my tears away.

"I've been thinking lately about you and me,

And all the questions left unanswered,

How it all could be.

And I hope you know,

You never left my head,

And if I ever let you down,

I'm sorry."

When he finishes he drops the microphone and throws his arms around me. I hold him back as he sobs into my shoulder, both of us completely forgetting about the crowd of kids watching us.

"I'm so sorry." Kellin sobs.

"It's okay. I'm sorry." I whisper.

Jesse wraps his arms around us and leads us backstage as Justin announces to the crowd that they're going to take a break. Jesse takes us to a little room and leaves, closing the door on the way out.

"I'm so sorry Vic." Kellin cries for the second time.

I grab his face in my hands up lift it towards mine.

"Don't you dare apologize. I should be the one that apologizing." I whisper.

"But I-I didn't tell you about the tour and I left and I'm just so sorry." He sobs.

"It's okay." I whisper pulling him into my arms again. "It's all in the past now. I was stupid for breaking up with you. I'm sorry."

He doesn't say anything as he gradually stops crying and rests his head against my chest.

"Sit down and we'll talk this all out, yeah?" I say and he nods sniffling as he sits on the sofa that's in the room. I sit next to him, crossing my legs and facing him. I take his hands in mine and I watch his lips twitch upwards at that.

"How have you been? How have you been coping with everything?" I ask, his health and safety my main priority.

"Not good." He admits. "You look tired; have you been sleeping?" He tries to turn the conversation back onto me but I'm not having it.

"Hey, we're worrying about you for the time-being. What do you mean you haven't been coping well? You look tired as well. Have you been sleeping?" I ask, a million questions running through my head.

He shakes his head and looks away. I cup him face turning it back towards me, studying the bags under his eyes. They're almost as bad as mine; almost.

"When was the last time you slept?" I ask.

"Thursday." He says and I sigh concerned. It's now Sunday. He hasn't slept in that long?

"Have you been eating?" I ask and he nods.

"Yeah, I sometimes forget but I've been trying." He says and I nod. At least he's been eating.

I look down at his arms that are covered with sleeves.

"Have you hurt yourself?" I ask and I instantly get my answer by the ashamed look on his face.

"I haven't in the past month." He mumbles.

"Oh Kell." I sigh. "Show me your arms, Darling."

He hesitates before rolling up his sleeves. They're covered in many brand new scars. Tears fill my eyes as I look down at them.

"I'm so sorry." I whisper. "I never meant to make you feel like that."

"No, it's not your fault." Kellin says pleadingly. "I felt a lot of self-hatred for leaving you so I took it out on myself. It wasn't your fault."

I wrap my arms around him and pull him onto my lap. He smiles lightly as he buries his face into my chest.

"I don't want you hating yourself, for any reason at all. We both messed up, we didn't deal with the problem and I behaved like a child. For that I'm sorry but there's no reason for you to hate yourself because I still love you Kellin. I never stopped. I missed you so much. And if it's not too much to ask, will you take me back?" I ask softly, fearing the answer.

"Really, you want me back?" Kellin asks sounding surprised and hopeful.

"Definitely. I can't live without you Kell." I murmur and his eyes go wide.

"Yes, yes of course I'll take you back." He practically squeals "I love you so much, with all my heart."

He crashes his lips to mine and I kiss him back, fireworks practically explode around us. I missed him and his lips so much. I missed his kisses and the way his arms snake around my neck.

"All my heart!" Kellin shrieks pulling out of the kiss before I'm reading. "Fuck, the show."

Both of us had forgotten that the show that still hadn't finished.

"How many songs do you have left?" I ask, selfishly just wanting to spend time alone with my boyfriend.

"Just one." He smiles and I follow him as we leave the room.

We walk to backstage where the guys are waiting looking frustrated and a little frantic.

"Finally." Gabe, the drummer, exclaims when he sees Kellin. "Did you guys sort things out? Are you good?"

"Yeah, we're all good." Kellin smiles wrapping his arm around my waist.

"We have a problem." Jesse speaks up.

"What is it?" Kellin asks now seeming anxious.

"Justin dropped my guitar and it broke, now we can't play. I think we're just going to have to end the show early." Jesse explains.

"No, there has to be another way. Is it fixable?" Kellin asks and the guys solemnly shake their heads.

"My guitar's in my car." I speak up and Kellin's face lights up.

"The one I bought you for your birthday?" He asks and I nod.

He grins and me and kisses my cheek.

"Cool, I'll get it." Justin offers and I throw him my keys before he disappears.

"You should take this one, Vic." Jesse says and I give him a confused look.

"Why?" I ask.

"I think you both need it." He smiles and I nod still confused.

It's not too long before Justin returns with my guitar.

"You ready to go out there?" Kellin asks me and I nod.

He takes my hand and leads me out to the side stage. The lights on the stage dim and there's a single spotlight pointing to two stools. We walk out onto the stage and the crowd cheers loudly. Kellin gives them a wave and we take our seat. He grabs the microphone and smiles out to the crowd.

"Sorry for the delay. Has everyone had a good night?" Kellin asks the crowd and they cheer. "Good, good. This is our last song for tonight. I wrote it for this attractive man next to me." Kellin grins and I let out a nervous chuckle. "This is All My Heart."

The crowd cheers and I grin. Kellin gives me a nod and I start strumming the guitar.

"There's so many things that I could say

But I'm sure it would come out all wrong

You got something that I can't explain,

Still try and try and let you know." Kellin grins brightly at me as he sings and I start to realize just how much I've missed him and this song.

"That first summer we spent's one we'll never forget,

Looking for any kind of reason to escape all the mess that

We thought was what made us

Ain't it funny now? We can see

We're who we're meant to be."

The crowd starts to sing along and it dawns on me that many of these kids can probably relate to it. It's Kellin and I's song but we get to share the meaning with thousands of people and they can take it and interoperate it as their own which is a beautiful thing.

"You still have all of my

You still have all of my

You still have all my heart." I start quietly singing along and Kellin's eyes light up even more.

"Ooh ooh ooh ooh

Ooh ooh ooh oooh

Ooh ooh ooh ooh

Ooh ooh ooh oooh..."

I don't think I've see him this happy before. Or maybe it's just because I've desperately missed his smile. He's always had the most beautiful smile.

"There's too many times I have to say

I could have been better and stronger for you and me." His smile falters and I give him a reassuring nod making that beautiful smile reappear.

"You always make me feel okay

Those late summers we spent, stay up talking all night

I'd ask "you think we'd ever make it?"

You'd say "I'm sure if it's right"

Ain't it funny to think just how stupid I used to be

Hope you always believe"

The rest of the band comes back out on stage and they start singing along as well.

"You still have all of my

You still have all of my

You still have all my heart

You still have all of my

You still have all of my

You still have all my heart"

It's in this moment when I realize that things can't get better than this. I've been so down these past few months and now everything has fallen into place. I'm happier than I've ever been. My dad's in jail, I have the most beautiful boyfriend in the world, my brother's awake and happy and everything is just perfect.

"Let them talk and talk and talk

Let them say what they want

We will laugh at the thought they don't know what we've got

Every year that goes by, a year older we are

You'll still be beautiful then, bless your beautiful heart

They'll talk and talk and talk

How crazy is it?

Someone could waste their whole life, helplessly,

Just patiently waiting for a love like you and me."

Kellin stops singing momentarily and lets the crowd sing.

"You still have all of my

You still have all of my

You still have all my heart."

I'd be lying if I said that this song doesn't make my heart swell and make butterflies appear in my stomach. I told Kellin to do something with his voice but I never expected this. I never expected that he'd make it this far and make such a beautiful thing out of it.

"You still have all of my heart

You still have all of my

You still have all of my

You still have all of my heart

You still have all of my

You still have all of my

You still have all of my heart."

The song finally finishes and Kellin looks like he's about to cry of happiness.

"I love you Vic." He says to me in the microphone.

"I love you too Kells." I murmur and he grins before standing up.

He and the rest of the band go to the front of the stage, take a bow and say goodnight to the crowd. I follow them off stage and Kellin engulfs me into a hug though I'm not feeling well. I haven't slept in a week and I'm going to pass out soon, I can feel it.

I gently push Kellin away and I begin to quickly hurry away. If I'm going to collapse, then I don't want to do it in front of him. I don't want to ruin his night. I hear him calling after me but I'm zoning in and out of consciousness. I get dizzy and fall down before darkness takes over.

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The spacing is weird in this chapter. Blame Wattpad. Vote/comment/follow. Bye!

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