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Story plot: Yeosang and Hongjoong finally got back to their house after the attempt to complete Yeosang's mission. The others are worried about Yeosang when they enter the house, but Hongjoong remains quiet about what happened. Yeosang wants to try and tell the others about his anxiety by himself with Hongjoong there to support him.

They walk slowly as Yeosang feels exhausted at this point. "We're almost there angel. We'll go straight to your room so I can tuck you in okay?" Yeosang yawns and nods. Hongjoong keeps his arm wrapped around Yeosang's waist to support his weight a little.

As they see the house Yeosang stops walking and turns to look at his boyfriend. "Please don't tell them. I want to do it. I just can't right now but I want to try to tell them myself. Will you be by my side?" Hongjoong stops walking and looks at Yeosang. He cups his boyfriends face in his hands and looks deeply into his eyes. "I'm already proud of you. No doubt that I will be right there next to you precious."

Yeosang smiles and kisses Hongjoong softly for a moment before continuing their way back to the house. Hongjoong opens the door and Yeosang walks straight up the stairs avoiding any contact with the others who are sitting at the table. Hongjoong glances at them and signs that he'll come back downstairs.

He hands Yeosang is comfortable pyjama so he can change into something more comfortable before falling into his bed. Hongjoong smiles sadly as he covers his boyfriend with the blankets. "Sleep well angel. I'll wake you up around 1 in the afternoon okay?" Yeosang mumbles something that sounds like a 'yes', but he falls asleep almost straight away once his head hits the pillow.

Hongjoong places one last kiss on his forehead before he closes the blinds and makes his way downstairs. He knows the others will probably fire questions about him about their entry, but he won't say a thing. He promised his boyfriend that he would stay quiet so that he can try to talk to them himself and he's going to stick to that promise.

All eyes are on him as soon as he enters the room and sits down with them at the table. "Is Yeosang okay? Isn't he coming down to eat breakfast?" Yunho asks as he looks at their leader. "No Yeosang went back to bed. I promised to wake him up around 1 in the afternoon so he'll eat something then."

"Is he okay? You guys only had to run around and greet some people. He can't be that exhausted from running." Mingi says being honestly confused about the whole situation at this point.

Hongjoong just shrugs. "I don't know he was tired and wanted to go to bed so that's what he did."

Seonghwa glances over at him, not buying any of this. "Hongjoong what happened? We're a team remember. You can tell us anything." Hongjoong sighs as he put some breakfast on his plate. "I know okay I know." He says, his voice filled with frustration.

"You don't have to get mad at Seonghwa hyung. He's just asking you what's going on." Wooyoung says firmly.

"I'm not deaf Wooyoung. Look. Something is going on okay. It's just that I promised Yeosang that I wouldn't talk about it because he wants to talk to you guys. He's just really tired right now so he went back to sleep." Hongjoong says as he looks at the others who nod silently. They can all tell their leader is really emotional so they drop the subject right away, trusting his statement.

Hongjoong eats in silence, the whole morning constantly replaying in his mind. He's been through quite some anxiety attacks with Yeosang but it was pretty bad this time. He's wondering if Yeosang will bring up past comments that might have hurt his feelings. There is just so much going on in his mind that he's not even paying attention to what the others are saying at this point.

He eats some breakfast before getting up. He can't be down here with them. He wants to be around Yeosang right now. He's not sure why but it doesn't feel right to be away from him.

He puts his plate in the sink and makes his way upstairs without saying a word. He silently enters Yeosang's bedroom and sits down on the chair that standing besides his bed. He looks over at Yeosang who is peacefully asleep. He takes one of his plushies and presses it firmly against his chest.

Yeosang doesn't deserve this. He doesn't deserve to live with this constant anxiety. Going through attacks like these. He deserves so much happiness and peace. He looks so peaceful now that he's asleep. I don't even want to wake him up in an hour. I could look at him for hours. Just watching him lay calmly in his bed with no signs of anxiety.

After and hour Hongjoong knows he needs to wake up his boyfriend. "Sangie.." He kneels down and kisses the tip of Yeosang's nose. "Angel it's 1 in the afternoon. I promised to wake you up around this time."

Yeosang nods and rubs in his eyes before opening them a little bit. He moves away to make room for Hongjoong who lays down on his side. "Hi baby." He whispers as brushes Yeosang's cheek with his finger. "How are you feeling?" Yeosang smiles and pecks his boyfriend's lips softly. "Better. Not as tired anymore." Hongjoong smiles. "That's good."

After a while they make their way downstairs because Yeosang is hungry now. Hongjoong makes him a plate and sits down next to him when he eats it. He's usually never this protective after an anxiety attack, because he knows Yeosang usually feels better afterwards. Maybe it's because he knows that Yeosang wants to tell the others about his problem.

The others are silently minding their own business, but Hongjoong can feel the tension. He hopes it's all over once Yeosang speaks up but he doesn't want to push his boyfriend right now after this heavy morning.

As Hongjoong moves to kitchen to do the dishes, the others join Yeosang at the table. Yeosang looks up and then back at Hongjoong. "Did you tell them?" He asks with some irritation in his voice. Having the others suddenly sit down doesn't feel right to him. 

Hongjoong quickly turns to face his boyfriend. "No baby no I promise. I did tell them that you wanted to tell them something but that's it." "Trust me, we don't know anything but it sounded pretty serious and since we'll be busy for the rest of the day we wanted to sit down with you now."

Yeosang swallows and nods as he feels that all the attention is drawn to him now. Hongjoong finishes up doing the dishes and sits down next to Yeosang. "I'm here now." Yeosang nods but stays quiet for a while.

Where do I start. Do I tell them about this morning? Do I tell them about past attacks? Do I just tell them in general? What if they think it's stupid. What if they think I'm making this up. Maybe they'll think it's some stupid childish thing. Who freaks out about the things I freak out about? What if they'll all start to watch my every step to make sure I don't freak out. Where did I get myself into?!

Hongjoong carefully squeezes Yeosang's hands. "Do I need to start angel?" Yeosang shakes his head but he's having a really hard time. He wants to tell it himself but it feels like someone is squeezing his throat so tight that no words come out. Hongjoong is a very patient boyfriend so he waits a little longer, until he realizes that Yeosang really needs his help to start this conversation.

"So there is something that Yeosang hasn't told you guys about yet. I do know what it is right baby?" Yeosang nods as he feels tears burning in his eyes. His thoughts are all over the place. His heartbeat his racing. He knows it's happening but he doesn't want to give in.

Hongjoong notices and kisses Yeosang's hands softly. "It's something you've been struggling with for quite some years right?" Yeosang nods the slightest bit as his breathing is speeding up as well.

I must do it myself. Why can't I just tell them! It's not that hard. I have anxiety and sometimes I get an anxiety attack. It's just a few words! Damnit!

"Alright baby it's alright, it's alright." Hongjoong gets up and stands behind his boyfriend, placing a kiss in between his shoulder blades. "It's just the eight of us. None of us is judging you. I'm really proud of you for taking this step." Yeosang nods as he holds Hongjoong's hand tightly now. 

He shuts his eyes tightly as Hongjoong shushes softly into his ear to help him relax before the attack gets worse. Hongjoong smiles as he can feel Yeosang calm down. He kisses his ear softly and sits back down next to him.

The others are just silently watching them, not knowing what's going on.

"Do you want to continue?" Hongjoong asks and Yeosang nods as he takes one last deep breath. "I- I'm dealing with anxiety for quiet some years. Already before I became a trainee. A- and sometimes the feelings and thoughts build up to a point where I panic."

Yeosang wants to say so much more. He wants to explain what goes on in his mind. What anxiety is to him, what happens if he does get an anxiety attack and how jokes about his shyness hurt sometimes, but nothing comes out. Thoughts are consuming his mind but he can't form the right words to say.

Wooyoung is the first one to speak up. "Wow.." He gets up and walks over to his best friend to hug him tightly. "Damnit Sangie you could have told me. I would have been there for you when you needed me. But I'm so proud that you told us right now." Yeosang stands up and wraps his tiny sweater paw hands around his best friend.

Before Yeosang can reply, the others make their way over to him and all hug him.

Hongjoong remains seated and smiles at the sight. He knew the others would still love Yeosang as much as before, but he Yeosang never believed him.

Seonghwa kisses his cheek in a friendly way. "I'm really proud of you Yeosang." "Are you feeling better now that you've told us?" San asks and Yeosang nods as he snuggles his face into the crook of Wooyoung's neck.

After some time they all settle back down and Yeosang rubs the tears from his eyes. Hongjoong cups his face in his hands again and kisses him softly for a brief moment. "You did it angel, I'm so proud of you." Yeosang smiles as he rests his forehead against Hongjoong's. "I couldn't have done it without you."

A/N: I got so many requests from you guys to write a part 2 so I did. I hope you guys liked it and I really hope it met your expectations.

Please let me know if you enjoyed reading part 2

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