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Chapter Forty-Two: Maggie

It wasn't easy getting her to talk about what happened between her and Evan, as it took a lot of readjusting on both of our behalfs. It was definitely a lot to take in at the start until eventually, and after a couple of days, she granted me the honor of finally telling me everything.

I couldn't blame her, there was a reason she hid this secret for so long and kept it away from all of us, and it was mainly because she got scared that we'd take actions into our own hands.

Not that I'd disagree with her on that, I would've kicked Evan in the face if I knew sooner.

But it did get me thinking how boundaries were never established between all of us, considering she had felt hesitant about telling us about their past, and it made me realize that what she said during our argument was true. I do tend to meddle.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way, I was just overflowing with anger that I didn't even realize what the hell was coming out of my mouth but it does get overwhelming, for a lot of reasons."

It made me reflect on the countless times when I did the same thing to either her, Levi and Evan and how I should've just listened instead of intervened.

It was a very emotional rollercoaster, to say the least, one that went on for days if I actually counted the time that had passed, but throughout that process, Evan gave me the space I needed to resolve the issue, and honestly? I've never been more thankful.

He's been nothing but patient and understanding with me and not gonna lie, as much as I found it hard to trust him ever since I found out about his past with Beth, he has been making the effort to earn my trust again and that's the one thing I'm most grateful for out of everything.

Because most people don't always have the heart to be forbearing with you, as a matter of fact, most people would rather run in the opposite direction than to spend another second keeping up with you and your problems than to actually stick around and wait until things get better.

I know how the world works, and I'm not gonna fool myself into thinking this type of treatment will forever be constant, that's why I should take advantage of it.

When as a matter of fact it's not, at least, not for now. Evan and I have gone through so much and every single time he has been patient with me and I don't think I'll ever truly realize how much that matters. How his presence alone in my life matters.

I don't know how I'm gonna let Beth know that without it being awkward because we have been spending so much time trying to cut down any sort of attachment she has with the past.

But forgetting the past also means accepting the present that I have now with Evan.

It was a sensitive topic that I was afraid to touch on, but we had to do it nonetheless.

It happened after a week's worth of self-assessment, solely on Beth's side, not until we reached the day where the final discussion was finally laid on the table.

We were both sitting on the couch of her living room, having just finished watching a feel-good movie, and afterward settled with talking about how she's been coping.

"So?" I asked, "How have you been feeling?"

She was cuddled up into a bundle of blankets on the opposite end of the couch, looking the most healthy and joyous I've seen her ever since the first time I visited.

She reacted to my question with a warm yet frail smile, almost as if she was doubtful to respond to my question, for there still wasn't a stable answer she had managed to cultivate.

"It's okay if you don't wanna answer," I told her, reaching out to grab her hand "It hasn't been that long anyway. You shouldn't feel pressured to feel okay right away."

She shook her head "No. You deserve to have an answer, you've been so kind and sympathetic with me throughout my healing that it'd just be selfish if I keep trying to second-guess whether or not I'm okay, only making you stay here longer-"

"You know that I don't mind," I proclaimed, holding her hand tightly "I'm not doing this because I feel like it's my obligation to comfort you, I'm doing it because I care about you."

Her eyes flickered up to meet mine, the gratitude in her face evident "Thanks, Maggie."

She sighed, looking down "I'll be honest, I still haven't completely moved on yet. The pain as well as the insecurities, and the resentment are still there, plus healing isn't an overnight process that happens right away, you know?" she said in which I nodded in agreement.

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive Evan, maybe in the future, but for now? The chances are highly unlikely."

"And you're not compelled to do so," I told her "I know people say that when someone wrongs you, the mature route to take is to forgive them, but you know what? Fuck that bullshit, you don't owe him anything. If you feel like Evan had hurt you way too much to the point that you won't be able to forgive him, that's your choice, okay?"

She was astonished by my words, but she nodded either way "I'm not gonna sit here and dictate your choices for you just because Evan means a lot to me too, but what I am gonna do is help you move on. To be indifferent to it and to just be... happy, because you deserve that, regardless if you've completely buried the hatchet or not."

She swallowed, her eyes getting glossy as she slowly leaned into me, causing me to put my arm around her as I engulfed her into a heartfelt embrace.

"He doesn't deserve you," she muttered after a prolonged moment of silence.

Taken aback, I stared at her with wide eyes as she looked back at me, amused "I'm sorry, but it's true. Evan doesn't deserve you and even though he's probably gone through hell and back just to prove himself to you, you are just too good for any man, Maggie. I don't even know if there's a single guy who truly deserves you. You deserve better than what you were given."

Feeling my eyes well up, I let out a chuckle that was somewhat restricted by the sob I was trying to suppress down my throat "Goddammit, Beth. We're here to focus on you!"

She laughed, snuggling her face into my chest "It doesn't matter, you deserve to be smothered by compliments. It's the least I could do after all the bullshit I've said."

I chuckled at that "You didn't lie, though. You were right about me meddling way too much."

"Yeah," she murmured, "But if you hadn't I wouldn't have gone through this whole self-evaluation thing that made me realize how much of a bitch I've been."

"You weren't a bitch," I said, "You were just hurt and you didn't know what you were feeling anymore. It's okay really."

"That, and I was just looking out for you too. I was honestly worried."

I grinned, looking down at her "Well, thank you. I appreciate it."

"I really was, though." she affirmed, staring up to meet my eye "I probably still am but..."

"Beth," I interjected softly "Don't worry, he won't hurt me."

She heaved out a deep breath, appearing conflicted "I know. He obviously cares a lot about you but I'm just worried. That's all."

I regarded her with an appreciative gaze "And I love you for that," I pecked her on the forehead, causing her to giggle "But you don't have to be anymore."

Because for once, in all the times that I have ever doubted my relationship with Evan, has this been the first time I am genuinely sure that things are finally going our way.

That there's no hesitation, no fear, and no anxiety about what may ruin us anymore.

To ruin me or him.

Because for once, I do feel like everything in my life has now been aligned.

That I'm more than ready to finally take the next step.

* * *

"Are you sure you'll be okay?"

Hugging the thin cardigan wrapped around her body, she waves me off to her front door until I was finally out her front porch.

"Go! You've been cooped up in this house for far too long that I'm pretty sure you've forgotten what sunlight feels like at this point," she said as I shook my head in amusement.

I stepped forward and gave her one last hug "Call me if you ever need anything, okay? I'm always here."

I felt her nod into the crook of my neck. "Of course and actually before you go, I want to tell you something."

I pulled away because of that "Sure, what is it?"

"It's about me and Evan," she said, "What's happened between us specifically."

My eyebrows raised at that as I encouraged her to continue "Go on."

"I just thought maybe..." she began "That even though I'll never be able to forgive Evan anytime soon, I thought maybe I would at least talk to him. You know, about you."

I blinked profusely, astonished. "You wanna talk to Evan about me?"

She nodded in confirmation "Yeah, I just wanna have a quick chat with him about what his plans are with you. You've been so caring and concerned about me these past few days that I thought maybe I'd return the favor and perhaps let Evan know what he's getting into."

"Which is?" I queried, eager.

She grinned cheekily at that "That if he's not careful with you, he can expect that I'll be the one showing up at his front door sometime soon. With a baseball bat, that is."

I couldn't help but laugh "You're crazy."

She just shrugged "Little bit, but only because I care about you."

Rolling my eyes, I pulled her into another playful embrace "So you mean that you'll beat Evan up with a baseball bat for me?"

"Of course," she chirped, smirking "What are friends for, after all?"

Before I could reply a honk was emitted right from behind us, causing us both to look over at her driveway only to be greeted with the sight of Evan's car parked by the sidelines, waiting for me.

He slid down the passenger side's window, tilting his head as he shot me a quick smile "You texted?"

Smiling like an idiot, I diverted my attention back to Beth as I grinned sheepishly "I hope you don't mind?"

"Of course, he just means well. Go," she said, motioning me to head along "Go home and get some rest, I'll be fine."

Backing up slowly, I bid her farewell until I eventually approached Evan's car and got in, all the while she stood there at her front porch, still watching us.

"Hey," I said to Evan as I finally got myself seated.

"Hey," he smiled back, beaming.

I turned back to Beth and gave her one last goodbye, "I'll see you soon!"

She waved back before tilting her head to the side to get a good look at Evan.

"Be sure to drive safely and to take care of her!" she yelled as she regarded him with a courteous nod before she turned on her heel and she walked back into her house.

While Evan was sitting there on his seat, stunned "Did she just... address me? Like an actual human being?"

Biting my lower lip to repress my bubbling laughter, I nodded "I think she just did."

He was quite dumbfounded, not knowing how to react "Wow, I mean the gesture was simple but that was probably the most civilized interaction we've had after so long." he implied, looking at me "What did you do?"

I chuckled "Nothing, it was all her. Don't expect too much though, you might jinx it."

He put his hands up in defense, laughing as he started the engine of his car "Okay, okay, I get the memo. It just shocked me though because she actually looked... happy."

He started driving the car out of her neighborhood, all the while I was too busy being giddy at the idea that Beth may actually be, truly happy "Yeah, I thought so too."

He briefly turned to me, seeing the overjoyed look on my face "I'm so proud of you, Carter." he muttered "For the both of you. To see you help her overcome her past one-step-at-a-time."

I turned to look at him with a small smile, reaching over to hold his hand as it sat atop of the gear stick "Of course," I felt him tighten his hold on my hand "What are friends for, after all?"

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