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I couldn't get any sleep, so there wasn't any point trying.

I got off of my bed, changed my clothes, and put on my shoes. I snatched my car keys and the slip of paper that had Asher's address and drew in a breath. I knew this was a bad idea.

But screw it.

I hated driving more than anything. I could have a panic attack behind the wheel, especially now that I wasn't taking my meds, so I had to always be careful and stay on the lane farthest to the right in case I had to pull over.

Shrugging it off, I exited my room and went down stairs to see Kalani and Justin in a hug. I

tried to just ignore them and head for the front door but Kalani saw me first.

"Hey, sweetheart!" she pulled away from Justin and he turned to see me. His face lit up.

"Hey! I didn't hear you come home. Going somewhere?" he asked. I paused where I was,

my hand hovering over the door knob.

"To Pine Creek." It was the lake Shane always took me to, to calm me down and himself down at times. Apparently, he used to spend most of his childhood days there with his parents before his father passed.

"You sure you wanna drive yourself? I could -"

"No. You guys must have a lot on your plate. Don't let me bother you." I quickly unlocked the door and left before Kalani could utter the words on her tongue. I didn't want her caring about me when she basically thought I was a waste of time.

I drove as steadily as I could, which probably prompted some drivers behind me to get mad

enough to swerve around me and step on their gas to show off. I headed towards Tyler's

neighborhood, which wasn't too far from mine but not to close either.

In what should have been fifteen minutes, I arrived at his house in twenty-five minutes. I parked at the curb of his drive way and got out of my car. I knew he'd probably wonder why the hell my car was mysteriously parked here, so I left him a message before using the piece of paper to find Asher's house.

It was three doors down. I hesitated, but there was no turning back. I didn't drive twenty-five minutes or get honked at multiple times only to back out. So, I picked up my feet and moved towards the small house. It felt weird once I was in front of his door. For one thing, he didn't even know I was coming, and he didn't know I even knew his address.

I rang the doorbell nonetheless. I hoped he was here, and that his car was inside of his garage. When no one answered, I didn't know why I broke. Probably because I felt overwhelmed, and needed someone to talk to.

I felt the tears staining my cheeks again and I turned to leave when I heard the door unlock.

It opened and I whirled around to see Asher there. He was wearing jeans and a white

button-up shirt, with the first few buttons open to expose part of his chest. I guessed he had

just thrown it on.

"Wha - Nolan?" he asked in surprise. "How'd you..." Then he noticed my tears and was lost

for words.

"I'm sorry. I... my friend lives on this street and..."

"No, no, come in." He opened the door wider and I entered. I kept on apologizing and he shook his head. "It's okay, it's okay." He held me by my shoulder, calming me down. "Sit down, talk to me." His voice had a rich calming effect; a soothing tone swimming through it.

He sat me down and joined me.

"Something happened," he stated the obvious, examining my tears and sad facial expression.

"Do you think I'm in the way?" I asked.

"No," he immediately answered. "Of course not. Why?"

I sniffed. "I think I am."

"But you're not."

"Yes I am. And here I am bothering you."

He chuckled. "I was only in the shower, Nolan, I'm not busy. Why do you think you're a

bother?"

He grabbed a tissue from the tissue box and handed it to me.

"I overheard Justin and Kalani talking. She came over, and I just wanna stay away from there for a bit. Kalani thinks I'm holding Justin back."

Asher sighed and shook his head. "Well, she's wrong."

I sucked in a shaky breath. "Why didn't you tell me you were getting them a house?"

"I... I've known Kalani forever, I guess. She wanted my help and that's how I met your brother. I've known him for months. Look, Justin didn't wanna let you know until they actually had a good home secured. We've found a good one Kalani likes and Justin hasn't seen it yet. He's already packing his things from what I know."

"I figured. His room's so neat... it's because he's packed most of his stuff." I nodded.

"Listen, you are never a bother. Not to me, at least. If something's up, I don't know how you got my address, but you did. So come see me when you have to."

"Don't you work?"

"I do." He stood up and walked over to the counter that separated the kitchen from the living room. On it, were some scattered papers and two pens. He tore a piece of paper and took hold of a pen and scribbled something on it. Then he gave it to me. "You can call me as

well."

I smiled gratefully at him and wiped my tears. "Thank you," I said quietly, tucking the paper in my pocket. He nodded.

"Want something to eat?" he offered.

"Oh - no, I'm fine."

"Nolan, I swear, if you think you're bothering me, you aren't. Let me make something for you."

My heart swelled at that. "Really?" I was usually always making food for someone else.

"Really," he confirmed. "Besides, I have someone coming here as well. I better make something for them while I'm at it."

"Can I help?" I asked.

He smirked. "If you really want to. Just let me go put on a better shirt."

He left me where I was. No wonder he showered. I wondered if it was his significant other, even though he claimed

not to have one. I found that very hard to believe, to be honest. Asher had small, brown, shiny curls and the face of a model. I had thought his eyes were steel blue, but now they looked green with brown spots scattered across it. Maybe the blue ones were contacts, I guessed.

My point was, he had to have somebody. Anybody!

I stood up and walked over to the small, framed picture that sat on the wall. Unlike the array of pictures on my wall back home, there was only one here.

I chuckled at it. Asher seemed to have been around... three years old. Not a thing changed. The curls, the eyes...

"Alright, ready?" I heard his voice as he came back. I whipped around and nodded.

"Yeah."

He led me into the kitchen and I grinned. The mere thought of cooking cheered me up.

"You don't look different from when you were little, you know."

He opened the fridge but not before raising an eyebrow at me in confusion. "I don't? Have you seen my baby pictures too?"

I rolled my eyes and leaned against the island. "No. Well, only the one on your wall. You know, if you don't want people to see it, it kinda shouldn't be on display," I teased with a laugh.

"Yeah, no, that's not me."

My smile faded and I simply nodded. "Oh... anyway, what're we making?"

"Pasta?"

I nodded. "Okay."

We began to cook after he brought out everything he needed. As much as I would've liked to cook on my own, since I was used to that, I was enjoying working with Asher to do it. It

was only pasta and here I was getting all excited. That made me smile.

"You didn't ask who the person in the picture was," he noted.

"I figured that would be prying."

"It wouldn't. You can ask me anything."

"I can ask you anything... but you wouldn't answer everything, would you? Besides, you seem to like to keep things to yourself. I don't wanna destroy any walls you've worked so hard to build. And I don't wanna find out something I can't handle."

"Well, he's my son. Can you handle that?"

I stopped for a moment then I slowly nodded. "Oh... you have a son?"

"I do. He's here actually."

A small smile crossed my face. "Really?"

Asher smiled back. "Really." He laughed. "Is really gonna be our okay?"

I squinted at him. "Wow, you're cheesy."

We laughed and I couldn't help the heat that rushed to my cheeks.

"Hey, at least I'm still young enough for movies like that," I pointed out.

"When can I meet your son? I mean... sorry. Ignore that." I wanted to slap myself for even asking that.

"Nolan, I'd love for you to meet him. As soon as he wakes up."

I was beaming. "Thanks. I would never have guessed you're a father!"

"Well, you thought I was a model. I take it your guesses aren't always accurate," he joked. I

laughed and he did as well. "Go on. Ask me."

I knew he read my expression, and saw that I was going through some things in my mind. I

decided to just ask, since he insisted.

"His mom?" I quietly inquired.

"Right. She... sorta wants nothing to do with him."

I bit my lip. I wanted to say I was sorry, but I realized how much I hated when people felt sorry for me. I didn't want to be a hypocrite and put him in that position as well.

"Is it hard on you without her?"

"No. It's easier. Remember when you talked to me about forgiveness? She's one of the

people I didn't forgive."

I focused on the sauce that I was making. "What's his name?"

"Zion."

"Wow, that's beautiful. So, will he eat pasta, too, or does he have his own little baby food?"

Asher chuckled. "He'll eat pasta like everyone else. Seriously, if he sees people eating something, he'll want to eat whatever it is."

"Aw," I giggled. "He sounds like such a sweetheart. Is he three?"

"Almost four. I was nineteen when he was born."

"You were still in college?"

"I was, but I lived off campus. I had help, of course, from Kalani. She schooled with me."

"Right, right." I nodded.

"Why are you so good at cooking?" Asher chuckled as he stood beside me to watch. "You

seem to have the recipe to everything in your head."

"Oh. Yeah, cooking gets my mind off of a lot of things. I tend to be good at it, and I'm used to cooking for people."

"Are you planning to go to a culinary arts school?"

"I would like to. But some people discourage me. They don't think it serves as a good profession."

"But you love it. Who cares what they think? Are they any better? If you become a chef one day, like a head chef, you could make as much as a teacher or more. Maybe even make your own recipes and be famous or something."

I chuckled at that.

"Can you promise me something, Nolan?"

"What?" I paused to stare at him. He stepped an inch closer to me.

"I can tell you're a good person inside. Don't let anyone put you down. You feel as if you're a burden to others and that's not true. Promise me you'll stop caring what other people say

about you. Like what you heard Kalani say. Just don't let things like that get to you. You're too good for unappreciative people. I mean... I know we're not close but you're generous. That much I know. Please maintain that."

I slowly nodded, comprehending his words. "I promise." I lowered the heat on the sauce I was making and faced him just a little bit, holding the counter for some support. "Thank you, I needed that. I'm actually um... starting to realize that sympathy is okay, like you said. Sympathy leads to understanding. And understanding leads to a bond."

He hesitated to speak, and for a second I swore his fingers touched mine slightly on the

counter. "Would you like to... stay for dinner?"

"I - don't you have a guest coming?"

"I can cancel."

My eyes widened. "Oh! No, seriously, you don't have to. I can come some other-"

"I don't wanna wait till another day. Frankly, I'm not ready to see that guest anyway. Just... stay. I wanna get to know you."

I stirred the sauce a bit more and turned off the heat. "Okay," I accepted.

Asher started to smile when the softest, sweetest little voice piped up from the kitchen opening behind us.

"Daddy?"

Asher and I turned around and I lightly gasped at the sight of a small child standing there. He was wearing a Mickey Mouse onesie with a matching beanie, and holding a Donald Duck plush toy. He had brown curls and green eyes with brown specks, just like his dad. The only difference was, his eyes were much bigger.

"Hey, love!" Asher walked over to his son and picked him up. "You slept for a long time, right?"

Zion nodded and yawned, stretching out in his father's arms.

"You wanna meet my friend?"

Zion gazed at me with his huge, beautiful eyes for the longest time before burying his face

in Asher's shoulder and hugging him tight. Asher chuckled and looked at me. "He's shy until

he's used to you. Ask him what he wants to be when he grows up."

I grinned and moved into Zion's view. "Hey, Zion," I said and he raised his head, only slightly.

"Hi," he quietly replied.

"What do you wanna be when you grow up?"

He raised his head higher, ecstatic to answer. "Mickey Mouse!"

I suppressed my laughter, but Asher couldn't.

"I love your onesie."

"Thank you." He lowered his head again, finding refuge in his dad's arms.

"He's the cutest," I gushed.

"Ah, thanks. I did well, didn't I?" Asher joked. "The world needs beautiful people."

I rolled my eyes playfully and watched Asher let his boy down. "Go play while we fix you some food, okay, love?"

"I show my toys?" Zion asked.

"I'd love to see your toys," I responded. Zion jumped up and down enthusiastically.

"Daddy, I show my toys!"

"Why don't you take him to your room, okay?" Asher permitted. Zion came over to me and grasped my pinkie, his excitement eliminating his previous shyness.

"I show my room!"

I laughed and followed him to his room. What a charming little kid. Like father, like son I guess.

*******

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